As I sit at my computer, reading reviews of mechanics, crunching numbers to see the most econimical way to get the Suburban towed someplace I saw the date on my computer and tears started to flow. I realize now how badly my parents ruined me. (Keep reading, it's not a negative post! I promise!) I miss my parents every day and I think about them often. Days like today I really miss them.
9 years ago today my dad died, 19 years and 4 days ago my mom died. Doesn't seem like it was that long ago for either one. I think about all the memories I have with them and then all the memories they've missed and the grandbabies they've missed seeing grow up. It strengthens my resolve to live a healthy life so I can hopefully be around to see my grandbabies and even great grandbabies grow. I was a daddy's girl and he made being the flashlight holder seem like the most important job to any mechanic. My mom made me feel like I could change the world and taught me that humor was the best medicine in any situation.(her viewing at the funeral home was proof of that. There was more laughter there than I've heard at some comedy clubs) I'd do anything to make her laugh. I loved to hear her contagious, loud, cackley laugh.
As with all kids I joke that they ruined me in some ways. I'm a guilt driven person because that's how my mom rolled when she wanted something that she knew I'd want to say no to....like giving her a foot massage. GROSS!!! I talk fast, it's annoying to some-I know. When I talk slower, or normal for most, I feel like I'm talking too slow and boring people. My mom loved evening shows and before VCRs where you could record shows, I had the commercial break to talk. You talk fast when you have a problem and have 3 minutes to get advice. She ruined me by teaching me to be aware of others around me...all the time. They both taught me the value of education and the ability to learn anything we want or need in so many different ways.
My dad never trusted a mechanic, ever. That's what got me this morning. I found myself needing to find a new mechanic because the one I had for 5 years has closed. Finding a mechanic, to me, is as difficult as finding a dr. My dad ruined me by teaching me enough that I can help diagnose a car problem, find a solution but not enough that I trust myself to do the work alone. If they were alive today I'd first ask my dad for car help and would beg to be his flashlight holder again. I'd get my rubber gloves out and rub my mom's feet. (I really did do this once just to get her to laugh.) And I'd thank them for ruining me. Because of them I will find a new mechanic today, have explained the problem in proper terms and with the knowledge I gained from my dad,I am more compassionate and have a heart that wants to help anyone and I've gone back to school at 47 with plans to graduate with my bachelors before I'm 50..and I've kicked myself for years for not doing it right when I was 20. Hindsight, you know, is 20/20.
I hope I have ruined my kids the same way my parents ruined me. if you are fortunate enough to have your parents living, tell them you love them, hug them and thank them for ruining you in all the good ways.
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