This is written with a very heavy heart. Last night we found
out that the second teenage boy we knew and loved in our community committed
suicide. In my facebook news feed this morning I'm reading about "sleep
training" babies, babies sleeping or not sleeping with parents, etc.
My
advice for each and every new mom out there is this: Enjoy this time. I know
you're exhausted, I know you would love a minute of alone time, I know you'd
like to eat grown up food for lunch and not kids leftover PB&J. To have a
minute in the bathroom alone would be like a piece of Heaven on Earth. I get
it. I really do. I have 6 kids...they were all born within 2 1/2 years or less
of one another--my closest gap is 16 months. I remember struggling with sleep
times, colicky babies, potty training, weird rashes or viruses. I promise this
time does fly by so fast...so very fast. My oldest just turned 21, my second is
a freshman in college and my youngest is in 2nd grade. So I'm 7 years distanced
from the little baby time but I will tell you this time will pass before you
know it. The babies will figure out when and how to sleep, reading books is
great and I'm sure there are great methods out there but the bottom line is
this...love your babies, hold your babies. So what if they wake up at 1 am take
that extra minute to take in that sweet baby smell, and feel the softness of
their cheeks and necks, sing an extra song to them. You are not alone, I'm sure
you've felt alone so many times as you change your 30th diaper that day,
changed your clothes 5 times in a day yet hadn't had time to take a quick
shower. So many of us have struggled with what you're going through. Enjoy this
time.
This is a sweet innocent time and I pray that none of you will have to tell
your 15 yr old son that another friend has taken his life. This is something I
wish no one had to go through. My heart breaks for, my kids, friends, their mothers.
I went to a prayer meeting to meet up with my son last night. He'd been at a church youth
activity and I'd not seen him since I’d heard. I called my husband to tell him about our son’s friend so
that he could tell him when they were alone . After the prayer meeting I bee
lined for my son who was sitting with the soccer team. I said nothing to him,
just wrapped my arms around his still small shoulders and held him while we
cried together. As I was holding him, in my mind he was 2 years old and had
fallen down the last 4 stairs and I made him feel better. He was the 10 year old
that was bravely sitting on the table in the ER, holding my hand, while his
forehead was being glued from taking a soccer cleat to the head. He was my 15
yr old baby that was trying to comprehend how he'd lost 2 friends to suicide in
less than 2 weeks. Last night's hug didn't take away the pain like my hugs did
before. But they let him know he was surrounded by my love and was not alone.
So...hug your babies, let them sleep on your shoulder a few minutes longer
before you put them in their crib. Your dirty dishes, leftover lunch mess and
even a shower will be waiting for you when you have a minute to get to them.
