I love New Year's Eve! Almost as much as I do Christmas. It brings excitement, hope for change and a renewed spirit. I set goals...not crazy goals but things I want to do better or to learn. I set several goals to reach by years' end and then smaller goals to reach each month. I usually do okay following these until about August when life starts to get so crazy I go on "Survival Mode" for a few months, then regroup again around New Years.
This year my husband and I decided it's the year we will do some big things for us and our family. Others may not think they're big things but to us they're huge...hopefully we'll feel much relief and happiness in our new found "freedom" and joy of giving more. I was talking to my kiddos about finding a catch phrase or name for the year that fits our line of thinking and goals. After many ideas that brought giggles from some and groans from others, we decided this will the year Twenty SLIMteen. We are slimming our wallet, budget and debt by following the Dave Ramsey Plan to get out of debt with more focus and stronger intensity. We've done okay with this the past year but there's always room for improvement. We hope to be able to do more with our family and to give more to others.
We are also planning to slim our clutter in hopes of finishing the basement for more kid parties and fun. We have a hopping house on a normal day, but when kids come over the happy noise increases and our unfinished basement would be even more fun and warm to hang out in with some carpet on the floor. :)
Most importantly, we are slimming our waistlines to just be healthier so we can continue to keep up with our busy, involved kids. This was my idea so I told my sweet husband that this is what we're doing. Since I do most of the cooking, he pretty much has to go along with it anyway, right? The whole family will benefit from this one!
I want to learn so much and I get so excited to do it all! I want to learn to spin pottery, how to tap dance...I'll do this one in my garage with all doors closed though. :) No one wants to see that-or maybe I don't want anyone to watch me trip over my own two feet all the time.
Set goals, make it fun. Set fun goals....after you reach a small goal...go have some fun and enjoy your accomplishment!
One of my favorite quotes about goals is this; "An unwritten goal is just wishful thinking." Write those goals or hopes down so it won't just be wishful thinking!
Have a Happy New Year doing exciting, fun things and bringing joy to your life.
Thursday, December 31, 2015
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
6 THINGS RUNNING FOR MAYOR TAUGHT US
In early June my husband, Jim, received a couple phone calls and emails asking him to run for mayor of our village. After a month of research, talking to the people that know what it entails and talking with our family, he decided to get his name on the ballot. With the election behind us by
a week, I thought I'd write about what we learned along the way. Some
stuff we expected to learn, some we knew and some surprised us.
1. WE HAVE FRIENDS WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW
You think you know who your friends are but after putting our necks out there you find you have more than you know. (I say "our necks" and not just Jim's neck. You'll see why later.) There are days I need to work at/from home and not leave; as everyone does at times I sometimes feel lonely, like I don't have a friend I can call and say, "hey! You wanna go grab lunch with me?" Have your husband run for Mayor and you'll find you have so many more friends that you ever thought. I've been stopped in our town shops, in neighboring towns and stores, I've gotten more calls, emails from people asking how we're doing or how we're holding up through a very busy season.
As a way to get out to meet other people Jim decided to have a bbq in other neighborhoods. Food always brings people together, right? At one of these bbqs one new friend came up to me, introduced himself and asked with all sincerity, "Are people being nice to you and your family?" This gentleman hadn't met me in person yet and was genuinely concerned for our family's well being. This kind of thing happened often and every time it touched my heart. The kindness and friendship our family was shown was at times overwhelming (in a very good way).
2. I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT ENJOYS "PEOPLE WATCHING."
When my kids were little we'd go to the mall and while my kids would spend energy in the play area, I'd watch people walk around,talk to others, help others. It's not like a creepy stalker stare :) I just enjoy watching people in different seasons of life and either remember "those days" or look forward to our next season. So many times I would be having a conversation with someone I knew and a new friend would walk up to us. I'd introduce myself and the one I was talking to would say, "her kids are so...." they'd always say something good. WHEW! Or they'd say, "she does...." "her husband is...." again..more good stuff. People do watch and are aware of what we do, say and the choices we make. As you watch people, I promise at some point someone will watch you and the choices you make. Always be kind. Always have compassion for those around you. Long ago, I saw a poster on a teacher's wall that read, "Character is defined by the choices you make when you think no one is watching." Jim's whole family put their necks out there. People let us know they saw choices the kids, Jim or myself we made. It was a great thing for the kids to learn and realize that people watch them, they take notice when a 16 yr old boy holds the door for older ladies. It was great for all of us to learn and realize we can make a difference simply by the choices we make.
3. THE NEWS ISN'T ALWAYS RIGHT
We knew this, I think we all do. They want to be the first to report "Breaking News." Well, even during an election the news can and does get it wrong. Our Village is divided between two counties. Jim won the race in one county and lost in the other. Combined numbers numbers show that "unofficially" Jim lost by 45 votes. Every news channel and one local newspaper got it wrong. They checked only one county. They don't care, it's reported, over and done. However, it's a week later and we're still explaining that the news screwed up. They got it reported fast-maybe even first, but they failed to check all their sources and information. We would never be angry, hurt or upset at anyone for asking or saying Congratulations. Though, we do feel bad for them when we explain the situation and they immediately apologize for saying anything. It's really no big deal and no one should feel bad. This isn't the end of the world. It's the end of one adventure before another new, fun adventure starts. I've thought a lot this week of my dad's advice he shared with me the night before I started high school,(he was a man of few words and what he said was always worth listening to) "Believe half you hear and half you see, a better person you will be." So...don't believe everything you hear on the news. There's a chance they don't have all the info. This was not something that we learned, but it was the first time we've experienced it first hand.
4. ABSENTEE AND PROVISIONAL BALLOTS--who knew??!
When Jim saw the poll results on the Board of Elections websites, he noticed that Absentee and Provisional ballots hadn't been tallied. This caused us to do some research. This was interesting and exciting research! Our oldest daughter is working in Texas and submitted an Absentee ballot. We called her to see what her instruction letter said with her ballot. "Absentee ballots must be post marked the day before the election (Nov 2, 2015) and delivered to the BOE by Nov 13." We then checked the website and googled when they'd be counted. We learned that the final count will be shared by November 24. We had no idea what a Provisional ballot was. It's a ballot that needs verified...someone moved, driver's license wasn't updated, need to show proof of residence or there was an error in locating their name in the voter sign in. They have 10 days to prove they live where they said they did. This year our precincts used Ipads to sign in. A few friends told me they couldn't be found electronically and then submitted a Provisional ballot. They haven't moved, have voted for years, etc. So..what's this mean for the Mayor race? The results say, "unofficial results" because all ballots haven't been received or counted. Jim can still win the election, we need to wait until Nov 24 for the "official results" to be posted. We don't know how great or slim his chances are because we have no idea how many ballots were submitted absentee or provisional. Though Jim was told last night that our Police Department Levy won by Provisional ballots a couple years ago. It's not over until every vote is counted and every voice is heard and when the website says, "Official results."
5. PEOPLE WILL SURPRISE YOU...ALWAYS!
I don't want to expand on this very much but it's true. People will surprise you...even if you think people can't surprise you...yes they will. Sometimes in good ways and sometimes in surprising or shocking ways. Win or lose (in life, a game or even an election), be classy, be kind, be respectful.
6. ENJOY THE RIDE
My brother has a motto for his band and their followers, "Enjoy The Ride." This too has been my motto for most of my life, though not in those exact words. I would often reevaluate where I was in life...Am I enjoying my journey? Is this a fun adventure? Am I on MY right journey, path or "ride"? Jim and I were talking before Election day and I asked him if he had fun running his campaign. He smiled and said, "I really did! It was fun meeting so many folks in our community. We made new friends, we learned a lot and we kept it clean and positive. Yes...I had a great time." I did too. I waited for his answer before I shared mine. Was it stressful at times? yes. Was it expensive? yes. Was it a waste of time? No. Did we do good? Yes! Did we enjoy the ride? Two thumbs up YES! Jim said, "whether or not the official results show a win or loss for me, I think I won." Yes. Yes he did! ....we all did.
1. WE HAVE FRIENDS WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW
You think you know who your friends are but after putting our necks out there you find you have more than you know. (I say "our necks" and not just Jim's neck. You'll see why later.) There are days I need to work at/from home and not leave; as everyone does at times I sometimes feel lonely, like I don't have a friend I can call and say, "hey! You wanna go grab lunch with me?" Have your husband run for Mayor and you'll find you have so many more friends that you ever thought. I've been stopped in our town shops, in neighboring towns and stores, I've gotten more calls, emails from people asking how we're doing or how we're holding up through a very busy season.
As a way to get out to meet other people Jim decided to have a bbq in other neighborhoods. Food always brings people together, right? At one of these bbqs one new friend came up to me, introduced himself and asked with all sincerity, "Are people being nice to you and your family?" This gentleman hadn't met me in person yet and was genuinely concerned for our family's well being. This kind of thing happened often and every time it touched my heart. The kindness and friendship our family was shown was at times overwhelming (in a very good way).
2. I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT ENJOYS "PEOPLE WATCHING."
When my kids were little we'd go to the mall and while my kids would spend energy in the play area, I'd watch people walk around,talk to others, help others. It's not like a creepy stalker stare :) I just enjoy watching people in different seasons of life and either remember "those days" or look forward to our next season. So many times I would be having a conversation with someone I knew and a new friend would walk up to us. I'd introduce myself and the one I was talking to would say, "her kids are so...." they'd always say something good. WHEW! Or they'd say, "she does...." "her husband is...." again..more good stuff. People do watch and are aware of what we do, say and the choices we make. As you watch people, I promise at some point someone will watch you and the choices you make. Always be kind. Always have compassion for those around you. Long ago, I saw a poster on a teacher's wall that read, "Character is defined by the choices you make when you think no one is watching." Jim's whole family put their necks out there. People let us know they saw choices the kids, Jim or myself we made. It was a great thing for the kids to learn and realize that people watch them, they take notice when a 16 yr old boy holds the door for older ladies. It was great for all of us to learn and realize we can make a difference simply by the choices we make.
3. THE NEWS ISN'T ALWAYS RIGHT
We knew this, I think we all do. They want to be the first to report "Breaking News." Well, even during an election the news can and does get it wrong. Our Village is divided between two counties. Jim won the race in one county and lost in the other. Combined numbers numbers show that "unofficially" Jim lost by 45 votes. Every news channel and one local newspaper got it wrong. They checked only one county. They don't care, it's reported, over and done. However, it's a week later and we're still explaining that the news screwed up. They got it reported fast-maybe even first, but they failed to check all their sources and information. We would never be angry, hurt or upset at anyone for asking or saying Congratulations. Though, we do feel bad for them when we explain the situation and they immediately apologize for saying anything. It's really no big deal and no one should feel bad. This isn't the end of the world. It's the end of one adventure before another new, fun adventure starts. I've thought a lot this week of my dad's advice he shared with me the night before I started high school,(he was a man of few words and what he said was always worth listening to) "Believe half you hear and half you see, a better person you will be." So...don't believe everything you hear on the news. There's a chance they don't have all the info. This was not something that we learned, but it was the first time we've experienced it first hand.
4. ABSENTEE AND PROVISIONAL BALLOTS--who knew??!
When Jim saw the poll results on the Board of Elections websites, he noticed that Absentee and Provisional ballots hadn't been tallied. This caused us to do some research. This was interesting and exciting research! Our oldest daughter is working in Texas and submitted an Absentee ballot. We called her to see what her instruction letter said with her ballot. "Absentee ballots must be post marked the day before the election (Nov 2, 2015) and delivered to the BOE by Nov 13." We then checked the website and googled when they'd be counted. We learned that the final count will be shared by November 24. We had no idea what a Provisional ballot was. It's a ballot that needs verified...someone moved, driver's license wasn't updated, need to show proof of residence or there was an error in locating their name in the voter sign in. They have 10 days to prove they live where they said they did. This year our precincts used Ipads to sign in. A few friends told me they couldn't be found electronically and then submitted a Provisional ballot. They haven't moved, have voted for years, etc. So..what's this mean for the Mayor race? The results say, "unofficial results" because all ballots haven't been received or counted. Jim can still win the election, we need to wait until Nov 24 for the "official results" to be posted. We don't know how great or slim his chances are because we have no idea how many ballots were submitted absentee or provisional. Though Jim was told last night that our Police Department Levy won by Provisional ballots a couple years ago. It's not over until every vote is counted and every voice is heard and when the website says, "Official results."
5. PEOPLE WILL SURPRISE YOU...ALWAYS!
I don't want to expand on this very much but it's true. People will surprise you...even if you think people can't surprise you...yes they will. Sometimes in good ways and sometimes in surprising or shocking ways. Win or lose (in life, a game or even an election), be classy, be kind, be respectful.
6. ENJOY THE RIDE
My brother has a motto for his band and their followers, "Enjoy The Ride." This too has been my motto for most of my life, though not in those exact words. I would often reevaluate where I was in life...Am I enjoying my journey? Is this a fun adventure? Am I on MY right journey, path or "ride"? Jim and I were talking before Election day and I asked him if he had fun running his campaign. He smiled and said, "I really did! It was fun meeting so many folks in our community. We made new friends, we learned a lot and we kept it clean and positive. Yes...I had a great time." I did too. I waited for his answer before I shared mine. Was it stressful at times? yes. Was it expensive? yes. Was it a waste of time? No. Did we do good? Yes! Did we enjoy the ride? Two thumbs up YES! Jim said, "whether or not the official results show a win or loss for me, I think I won." Yes. Yes he did! ....we all did.
Thursday, October 15, 2015
Until we meet again.
This morning the world lost a very kind man that always put his family
first and taught them by example. Heaven, I'm sure got even happier.
My grandpa was a good man that I always knew loved me. My mom was married, had 2 kids, after 13 years divorced our biological father and a few years later married the man that adopted us and raised us as his own. He was 21, my mom 32. I'm sure, as his dad, it wasn't easy to accept this and to welcome 2 grandkids that were older than his other grandkids he'd known since their birth. I've been thinking a lot about grandpa the past few weeks, not knowing of his declining health and kept brushing away the thoughts to call him and say hi. What I've been thinking about is the way he loved his family and how devoted he was to my grandma and the similarities between my grandpa and my dad. There are so many and I'm so touched by many of these similarities.
My grandpa told me yesterday between pained breaths and a very weak, quiet voice that grandma is 88 and he was 83. I'd forgotten he was younger than she was. A few similarites are these: Grandpa married a divorced woman with 3 children, he was younger than she was, he adopted those 3 kids and raised them as his own, he worked hard to provide for his family. My dad married mom, adopted us, raised us and worked hard for us and fearlessly protected us. I think those are the similarities that struck me the hardest as I sat holding my grandpa's hand yesterday.
I believe I have the life I have in large part due to my grandpa. My mom had a very different social life than she did before she met my dad and grandparents. He raised a boy that would follow his example and do his best to give us a good life and make sure we did better than he did. He raised a boy that valued education so much so that attending college was an expectation, not a choice. He taught my dad how to treat his wife, love her children, work hard and to always put his family first. He helped my mom and dad find God.
My dad loved my grandpa so much that when he was little, he once put ketchup on his hair to try to dye it red so he could be just like grandpa. The red didn't stay very long but it did give him his life long nickname of "Rusty."
Because of my grandpa I married a man that feels, loves, protects and works just like he did and like his son did. Because of my grandpa (and several others in our family) I have a respect for our military service men and women. Because of grandpa my family and extended family is better for having him in our lives.
Grandpa is the 4th close relative I've lost in October. (mom, dad, my Uncle Jim and now grandpa Bell) I still love the month of October. My mom hated it because it was a reminder of people she'd lost. I choose to stay positive and happy about this season...season in nature and season in life.
As the trees lose their leaves this month, I'm reminded of the loved ones I've lost. However, I'm also reminded as I hear kids' laughter fill the air while they jump in those fallen leaves, that each fallen leaf is a blessing and adds to the joy they've given both on the trees and off, just as all those that have gone before me. Their lives and those memories are a blessing to be celebrated and remembered.
RIP Grandpa Bell. We love you and thank you for being the man you were.
My grandpa was a good man that I always knew loved me. My mom was married, had 2 kids, after 13 years divorced our biological father and a few years later married the man that adopted us and raised us as his own. He was 21, my mom 32. I'm sure, as his dad, it wasn't easy to accept this and to welcome 2 grandkids that were older than his other grandkids he'd known since their birth. I've been thinking a lot about grandpa the past few weeks, not knowing of his declining health and kept brushing away the thoughts to call him and say hi. What I've been thinking about is the way he loved his family and how devoted he was to my grandma and the similarities between my grandpa and my dad. There are so many and I'm so touched by many of these similarities.
My grandpa told me yesterday between pained breaths and a very weak, quiet voice that grandma is 88 and he was 83. I'd forgotten he was younger than she was. A few similarites are these: Grandpa married a divorced woman with 3 children, he was younger than she was, he adopted those 3 kids and raised them as his own, he worked hard to provide for his family. My dad married mom, adopted us, raised us and worked hard for us and fearlessly protected us. I think those are the similarities that struck me the hardest as I sat holding my grandpa's hand yesterday.
I believe I have the life I have in large part due to my grandpa. My mom had a very different social life than she did before she met my dad and grandparents. He raised a boy that would follow his example and do his best to give us a good life and make sure we did better than he did. He raised a boy that valued education so much so that attending college was an expectation, not a choice. He taught my dad how to treat his wife, love her children, work hard and to always put his family first. He helped my mom and dad find God.
My dad loved my grandpa so much that when he was little, he once put ketchup on his hair to try to dye it red so he could be just like grandpa. The red didn't stay very long but it did give him his life long nickname of "Rusty."
Because of my grandpa I married a man that feels, loves, protects and works just like he did and like his son did. Because of my grandpa (and several others in our family) I have a respect for our military service men and women. Because of grandpa my family and extended family is better for having him in our lives.
Grandpa is the 4th close relative I've lost in October. (mom, dad, my Uncle Jim and now grandpa Bell) I still love the month of October. My mom hated it because it was a reminder of people she'd lost. I choose to stay positive and happy about this season...season in nature and season in life.
As the trees lose their leaves this month, I'm reminded of the loved ones I've lost. However, I'm also reminded as I hear kids' laughter fill the air while they jump in those fallen leaves, that each fallen leaf is a blessing and adds to the joy they've given both on the trees and off, just as all those that have gone before me. Their lives and those memories are a blessing to be celebrated and remembered.
RIP Grandpa Bell. We love you and thank you for being the man you were.
Monday, September 14, 2015
Beginnings of our Decade Nights
I'm finally making the time to blog again and after many requests I'm blogging about our Decade Nights we did over the summer. This whole idea started as a rainy day activity and laugh with the kids, I had no idea it'd be such a hit and the fun stuff the kids learned is being used in school now and will be used later this year too. Major Mom Win!!!
HOW IT STARTED
I'm sure I'm outnumbered in my thinking this but I think 12 weeks is a long time for kids not be learning something. I love having my kids home but so much can be lost or forgotten in that time. I always find something for us to do, road trips, fun books to read together, map/states/capital study, etc. I find fun ways to do these things but this year I was having trouble thinking of something fun do and with crazy schedules it made it more difficult to figure something out what to do with the 4 kids still at home.
Thanks to my kids choir teacher..my "lightbulb moment" finally came! My son came home during the last week of school in May and told me about this hilarious 60's movie he was watching in Show Choir titled "What's Up Doc?" As he told me about this movie I kept thinking of other cheesy/funny shows he might like. Elvis' Blue Hawaii was the first that came to mind. We got on Netflix, looked up Elvis and other 60s's beach movies and watched a few trailers of hits from that era. He thought James Dean in A Rebel Without a Cause was the funniest. (Whatever!) We had a good time laughing at obvious differences in film making and the cheesiness that many of these films had. This was when summer fun lightbulb lit up. "Hey! How would you like to have a 50's night with everyone? We can watch an old tv show, have dinner and listen to 50s music." He loves "retro" stuff so I didn't have to twist his arm too much. I ran the idea by my husband, Jim, to see what he thought and I extended it to be a decade night once a week throughout summer. He was in and said it was a "fabulous" idea. We then took it to the rest of the kids, who were sold on the idea immediately. They really are an easy bunch to excite and impress.
Our two oldest girls were still away at school when they heard about this. They too got excited and asked...no they begged...to have us time it so they would be home for 80's night. June was insane for our kids with camps, sports, work, etc, so we delayed the start until July. This limited the decades we could do before school started but we still got some decade fun in...even on vacation! I had no idea how educational it would end up being, how much fun and how genuinely excited everyone was about this.
GETTING IT TOGETHER
I figured out when everyone was back home together and started with the 80's and counted backwards to find our start week and decade. After finding one night everyone was home, we put it on the calendar. In our house, if it doesn't get put on the calendar, there's no guarantee it will get done or that I'll remember. Jim and I thought of 6 topics (we added 2 when the girls got home from school.) The topics were put on paper and tossed in a bowl. We were off! The kids chose their topics to research and ran away to learn everything they could.
TOPICS
WHAT WAS LEARNED
Not only did the kids learn their topic from that decade, they learned how to research--on internet, at library, interviewing neighbors. They learned how to make a powerpoint presentation, improved public speaking skills and family history.
Here are a few of my fav pictures from the 50's. I'll post pictures and some info they were most excited about tomorrow. I'll post more starting tomorrow. Each decade will have it's own entry and pictures.
HOW IT STARTED
I'm sure I'm outnumbered in my thinking this but I think 12 weeks is a long time for kids not be learning something. I love having my kids home but so much can be lost or forgotten in that time. I always find something for us to do, road trips, fun books to read together, map/states/capital study, etc. I find fun ways to do these things but this year I was having trouble thinking of something fun do and with crazy schedules it made it more difficult to figure something out what to do with the 4 kids still at home.
Thanks to my kids choir teacher..my "lightbulb moment" finally came! My son came home during the last week of school in May and told me about this hilarious 60's movie he was watching in Show Choir titled "What's Up Doc?" As he told me about this movie I kept thinking of other cheesy/funny shows he might like. Elvis' Blue Hawaii was the first that came to mind. We got on Netflix, looked up Elvis and other 60s's beach movies and watched a few trailers of hits from that era. He thought James Dean in A Rebel Without a Cause was the funniest. (Whatever!) We had a good time laughing at obvious differences in film making and the cheesiness that many of these films had. This was when summer fun lightbulb lit up. "Hey! How would you like to have a 50's night with everyone? We can watch an old tv show, have dinner and listen to 50s music." He loves "retro" stuff so I didn't have to twist his arm too much. I ran the idea by my husband, Jim, to see what he thought and I extended it to be a decade night once a week throughout summer. He was in and said it was a "fabulous" idea. We then took it to the rest of the kids, who were sold on the idea immediately. They really are an easy bunch to excite and impress.
Our two oldest girls were still away at school when they heard about this. They too got excited and asked...no they begged...to have us time it so they would be home for 80's night. June was insane for our kids with camps, sports, work, etc, so we delayed the start until July. This limited the decades we could do before school started but we still got some decade fun in...even on vacation! I had no idea how educational it would end up being, how much fun and how genuinely excited everyone was about this.
GETTING IT TOGETHER
I figured out when everyone was back home together and started with the 80's and counted backwards to find our start week and decade. After finding one night everyone was home, we put it on the calendar. In our house, if it doesn't get put on the calendar, there's no guarantee it will get done or that I'll remember. Jim and I thought of 6 topics (we added 2 when the girls got home from school.) The topics were put on paper and tossed in a bowl. We were off! The kids chose their topics to research and ran away to learn everything they could.
TOPICS
- food-I always got this one since I make dinner most nights.
- TV shows/Movies
- Media (books & magazines)
- Games/Toys
- Music
- Fashion
- History & famous people
- Add ons: technology
WHAT WAS LEARNED
Not only did the kids learn their topic from that decade, they learned how to research--on internet, at library, interviewing neighbors. They learned how to make a powerpoint presentation, improved public speaking skills and family history.
Here are a few of my fav pictures from the 50's. I'll post pictures and some info they were most excited about tomorrow. I'll post more starting tomorrow. Each decade will have it's own entry and pictures.
 |
| 60's treat |
 |
| 80's night. Kara, in the brown skirt, was the fashion consultant this week. |
 | |
| My fav! Kara's laughing at Hunter's 80's technology presentation. "were there Ipods in the 80s?" |
 | |
| They kids got so into this that they dressed up for each decade night. |
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
Go back to school, stress free
I've been working on so many new blog ideas but none of them are "perfect" yet. In trying to take my own advice I am letting go of the some of the perfectionist in me and getting things done. I think if I wait for them to be perfect, they won't be completed.
Back to school time is fun, exciting, bittersweet and can be incredibly busy time. It takes time to get ready for the craziness but it's so worth it. When school days and sports hit we're ready for smooth sailing...or at least ready to handle the last minute crisis with more patience and ease. :)
School Supply Shopping:
I have a shelf in my basement that holds all supplies from each year, you know...the stuff that gets dumped out of backpacks every June and left until August? We go through backpacks after school's out and decide then what can be reused/recyled or tossed out. After we've done that, they get put on the shelf until time to start "shopping" there first.
When it's time to get school supplies I first download all lists from each student and send the kids to the supply shelf with their list. They get what we have, cross it off, put in their pile and give me the marked off list. I then take each list and compile ONE shopping list. This takes time to set up but every year I'm so happy I did. This year the kids kept running to ask me what's next on the list, they'd go grab it, dump in the cart and go for more. We were done shopping in 15 minutes. Fastest time yet! They all loved racing each other...even the 16 year old was happy to help get stuff. Maybe that was because I'd promised them lunch after shopping, though. He's all about food. HA!
School Lunch Time
We like the kids to pack school lunches for several reasons: saves the budget, healthier (sometimes) and they will eat what they pack. The kids like to because they have more time to chat with friends by not waiting in line at the cafeteria. To help with ease of morning rush I have 2 shelves in our "extra pantry" (converted catch-all closet). One way we choose to teach them to budget is to have them choose one day a week to buy. Our schools have a lunch account we can put money into whenever we want, so every month the kids get enough money for 5 lunches and milk every day, when that money is gone, they're done buying stuff...unless they want to pay for it out of their own pocket.
The top shelf is for after school practices, rehearsals or games. And who doesn't always lose their water bottles? Now they have a place to put them. The bottom shelf bucket labels are: fruit, applesauce, pudding, snack/treat. They kids know my rule is one fruit or applesauce plus a yogurt or fruit from the refrigerator and one treat/snack item. The treat bucket is usually filled with granola bars, pretzel packs, goldfish, etc.
Anyone who comes to my house knows that I don't stress about cleaning the house the last 2 weeks so summer. It's tidy but certainly not "company clean". My kids will gone for 6 hours a day and I'll have plenty of time to get it cleaned after they're back in school...unless I'm subbing in one of the schools. (I love subbing! Best paid job ever!)
I hope you enjoy the last few weeks of summer and that the start of your school year is a fun, easy transition.
Back to school time is fun, exciting, bittersweet and can be incredibly busy time. It takes time to get ready for the craziness but it's so worth it. When school days and sports hit we're ready for smooth sailing...or at least ready to handle the last minute crisis with more patience and ease. :)
School Supply Shopping:
I have a shelf in my basement that holds all supplies from each year, you know...the stuff that gets dumped out of backpacks every June and left until August? We go through backpacks after school's out and decide then what can be reused/recyled or tossed out. After we've done that, they get put on the shelf until time to start "shopping" there first.
 |
| Inside the first few binders I have sheet protectors, loose leaf paper (one binder for college ruled and one for wide ruled) and tabbed dividers. Buckets are broken down with pens, pencils, colored pencils; another one with paper stuff (post it notes/flags and index cards); last one markers, sharpies and highlighters. |
When it's time to get school supplies I first download all lists from each student and send the kids to the supply shelf with their list. They get what we have, cross it off, put in their pile and give me the marked off list. I then take each list and compile ONE shopping list. This takes time to set up but every year I'm so happy I did. This year the kids kept running to ask me what's next on the list, they'd go grab it, dump in the cart and go for more. We were done shopping in 15 minutes. Fastest time yet! They all loved racing each other...even the 16 year old was happy to help get stuff. Maybe that was because I'd promised them lunch after shopping, though. He's all about food. HA!
 |
| One list is so much easier to take to the store than 1. |
 |
| This list used to have 6 lists |
School Lunch Time
We like the kids to pack school lunches for several reasons: saves the budget, healthier (sometimes) and they will eat what they pack. The kids like to because they have more time to chat with friends by not waiting in line at the cafeteria. To help with ease of morning rush I have 2 shelves in our "extra pantry" (converted catch-all closet). One way we choose to teach them to budget is to have them choose one day a week to buy. Our schools have a lunch account we can put money into whenever we want, so every month the kids get enough money for 5 lunches and milk every day, when that money is gone, they're done buying stuff...unless they want to pay for it out of their own pocket.
 | |||||
| The bottom shelf buckets came from our local Dollar General for $1.50. Top shelf buckets were recycled from someplace in the house. |
Anyone who comes to my house knows that I don't stress about cleaning the house the last 2 weeks so summer. It's tidy but certainly not "company clean". My kids will gone for 6 hours a day and I'll have plenty of time to get it cleaned after they're back in school...unless I'm subbing in one of the schools. (I love subbing! Best paid job ever!)
I hope you enjoy the last few weeks of summer and that the start of your school year is a fun, easy transition.
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
Chicken Pasta Salad
This week's post has been inspired by a favorite summer meal I made my family tonight. I find it so fascinating how fast sounds, smells and tastes can send us back to sometime in our past. My great grandma's house had this amazing smell that I can't describe but it always made me feel safe, happy and loved. A few months ago I walked past a cute store that had the same smell. I stopped immediately and stood there looking quite silly, I'm sure, slowly taking in the smell of that store and smiling as I thought of my sweet great grandma; I remember her eyes that would light up when she smiled and heard her laugh as we "raced" to her rocking chair. Our senses are amazing gifts to have!
Tonight's dinner was a chicken pasta salad that I first tasted 20 years ago when my oldest daughter and I picnicked with my sweet neighbor friend and her three oldest kids. I quickly got the recipe from my friend and made it for my husband. It has since been a family summer favorite. Since it's not a dairy based dressing I've made this for dinners on the go during those crazy summer night activities.
Just as I was pouring the dressing over the all the yummy ingedients my 14 yr old daughter walks in, races over to the counter, picked up a piece of chicken and popped it in her mouth. As soon as she bites down she rolls her eyes (in a good way!), smiles and says, "MMMMmmmmm. I LOVE this salad so much!" and runs back outside. As I took my first taste test I was taken back to that warm summer day I first tasted this salad. A smile comes to my face as I see my barefoot 2 year old running around the soft yard with her friends and my friend sitting on the plaid blanket as we share this big bowl of the best pasta salad I had ever eaten.
Below is the Chicken Pasta Salad recipe. (I wrote this recipe out for my daughters when they left for college. Ignore the notes, unless it's something you're learning too.) I hope it brings a smile to your face as all the flavors of the spices, red wine vinegar and dijon mustard hit your taste buds. I promise if you take this salad to any potluck or picnic you will bring home an empty bowl.
Chicken
Pasta Salad
Prep time 30 minutes
Serves 8-10
16 oz pasta
1 bunch broccoli florets
1 small red onion, slivered
1 red pepper, cut julienne
1-6oz can black olives, drained
3 lbs chicken, cooked & cubed
Dressing
½ C vegetable oil 1 TBS Dijon
mustard
¼ C olive oil 1 TBS
chopped parsley
1/3 C red wine vinegar 2 tsp of each dried spice:
2 garlic cloves, pressed basil, tarragon, marjoram, chives
Parmesan cheese to taste and cashews
Cook chicken and rinse with cold water. Cook pasta, drain and rinse with cold water.
Blanche broccoli florets (to blanche something you do the following: Fill pan
with water, just enough water to cover
broccoli, bring to a boil and add broccoli and cook for 1 minute. After 1 minute drain and rinse in cold water.
Rinsing in cold water stops the cooking process. )
Mix everything else together and let
chill for at least an hour before serving. Serve with cashews and parmessan cheese.
RECIPE NOTES:
A pasta that isn’t huge is best for
this salad, as it won’t soak up all the dressing. I use the big wagon wheel
pasta but have used penne too. Bow tie pasta isn’t great with this.
I’ve also used Balsamic vinegar
instead of Red Wine Vinegar. It tastes fine, just has a more bitter flavor
rather than tangy.
Don’t add the
cashews to the whole bowl of salad because they’ll get soggy fast.
Dried spices
are more potent than fresh. So if you use fresh spices, use tablespoons rather than
teaspoons but use the same number measurement. In this case, 2 TBS for fresh, 2
tsp for dried.
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
Life's magical moments
A cool, summer evening in Ohio is a rarity, especially in June. So, I decided to come outside to read a book on the porch and soak up some of nature's beauty. When I hear summer magic happening, I closed my book and listened as summer magic unfolded.
I then closed my eyes so I hear every sweet sound the night held....5 boys ranging in age from 11 to 20-something playing ball at our basketball hoop we've left in the middle of the court for all to enjoy. A random boy will sing, "If you love me, let me goooo" as he shoots the ball followed by the ting of the rattling hoop and collective, "aaaahhh". I hear a sweet little girl pleasantly yell out to everyone, "Good night!" as her dad whisks her inside for bed. (I remember the days of trying to coax a younger kid inside for bath and bed as older kids are still outside enjoying the setting sun. Some moments I really miss having younger kids around; though, this moment, I don't envy him.) Birds are happily chirping and then I hear my carefree 8 year old son sing at the top of his lungs, "Zip a dee do da. Zip a dee a. My oh My What a Wonderful Day!" I can't help but smile at his song choice tonight. He's riding his bike around the court singing the entire song and doesn't care if anyone hears him or even sees him. He rides his bike, weaves around toys, chalk and his sister as he continues to belt out this happy tune. And it is then that I think, this is the perfect place to live. This is magic and life is beautiful.
For years Jim and I have considered moving to the country. Having a big farmhouse on a few acres would be such a great life! We could have bonfires, have ATVs the kids could run around on, a big Walton style kitchen table.... Then I experience this night and all the beautiful sounds.
This is our first summer in over 14 years that we don't have someone playing softball or baseball. For the past several years, we've had 3 or more playing ball which means it took our own kind of magic to get everyone where they needed to be at the right time and to have a cheering squad of some sort. I often wondered what it'd be like to enjoy a glass of lemonade on a relaxing summer evening. This year, I finally get to find out. I look forward to more nights like this one and being able to experience more summer magic. I don't need a few acres or a huge Walton style kitchen table to have a great life full of magic. I just need to step outside our front door and listen to the happy sounds of life on our court.
Life is quite often full of magical moments. I hope we all take the time to stop and the enjoy the magic life brings.
Happy Summer everyone!
I then closed my eyes so I hear every sweet sound the night held....5 boys ranging in age from 11 to 20-something playing ball at our basketball hoop we've left in the middle of the court for all to enjoy. A random boy will sing, "If you love me, let me goooo" as he shoots the ball followed by the ting of the rattling hoop and collective, "aaaahhh". I hear a sweet little girl pleasantly yell out to everyone, "Good night!" as her dad whisks her inside for bed. (I remember the days of trying to coax a younger kid inside for bath and bed as older kids are still outside enjoying the setting sun. Some moments I really miss having younger kids around; though, this moment, I don't envy him.) Birds are happily chirping and then I hear my carefree 8 year old son sing at the top of his lungs, "Zip a dee do da. Zip a dee a. My oh My What a Wonderful Day!" I can't help but smile at his song choice tonight. He's riding his bike around the court singing the entire song and doesn't care if anyone hears him or even sees him. He rides his bike, weaves around toys, chalk and his sister as he continues to belt out this happy tune. And it is then that I think, this is the perfect place to live. This is magic and life is beautiful.
The "big boy" went inside to help with his kiddos bedtimes
My happy singer stopped to join me on the porch.
For years Jim and I have considered moving to the country. Having a big farmhouse on a few acres would be such a great life! We could have bonfires, have ATVs the kids could run around on, a big Walton style kitchen table.... Then I experience this night and all the beautiful sounds.
This is our first summer in over 14 years that we don't have someone playing softball or baseball. For the past several years, we've had 3 or more playing ball which means it took our own kind of magic to get everyone where they needed to be at the right time and to have a cheering squad of some sort. I often wondered what it'd be like to enjoy a glass of lemonade on a relaxing summer evening. This year, I finally get to find out. I look forward to more nights like this one and being able to experience more summer magic. I don't need a few acres or a huge Walton style kitchen table to have a great life full of magic. I just need to step outside our front door and listen to the happy sounds of life on our court.
Life is quite often full of magical moments. I hope we all take the time to stop and the enjoy the magic life brings.
Happy Summer everyone!
Monday, May 25, 2015
Re-disovered...I'm not so different
It's been a while since I've written a post and my kids have been on me to write...so here's my last "essay" type of post. I've gotten away from what I originally intended this blog to be. I'll be playing around with it this summer, so stay tuned!
As the school year started I thought a lot about my personal rediscovery. I've been a Stay At Home Mom for 21 years and have loved every single minute of it. Now that my youngest is in 2nd grade, I thought I'd finally take some time to find out what my interests are and what, if any, new hobbies I could find. Here's what I re-discovered about myself...
5. I can't sit still for very long.
I WORK BETTER UNDER STRESS
I found out pretty fast that I get more done and feel better if I have a list of "to-do's". This is nothing new. I just didn't realize it is part of me, regardless of how young or old my kids are. If I don't have a list of things to do or projects to start or finish then I just wander aimlessly until I find something to settle with. My kids teased me a few years ago when my youngest started kindergarten because I'd decided to start subbing in our schools, ran for School Board, had crazy ideas and goals to change the house--paint, rearrange, clean out closets...all at once.
I GENUINELY LIKE PEOPLE...all people, every where I go.
I've read behavior isn't genetic but I I truly think some behaviors might be. My biological father never met a stranger, my uncles have never met a stranger, my brother never meets a stranger and neither do I. My kids used to laugh at me because by the time we left the grocery store I had a new friend in the person behind me in line or with the cashier. I do miss not having babies with me as a conversation starter, but I've found that as life changes so do my conversations and conversation starters. When helping set my college kiddos up in their apartments, I've learned that this trait has been shared with them too....Who's laughing now?
I REALLY HAVE MISSED READING BOOKS, age appropriate books
I started a book club in my fun little town. The first month I was so excited to read just for me that I read the first two months of books we'd chosen. I've since learned to pace myself a bit better but oh how I love to read and learn! I also discovered that over the past 21 years my vocabulary has decreased a bit. I read the first book on my kindle and love that I can highlight words I don't know; I can even look up the definition right there on the spot! There were at least 15 words I learned in that book. I should report that book was about 400 pages because 15 words out of 400 pages sounds better than 15 words out of 80 pages. HA!
I STILL LIKE CREATING THINGS
I made a few things for my house and family and after friends saw them I kept hearing, "You should sell this!" So...after a few months of consideration (and lots of encouragement from husband and kiddos) I started a blocks craft business, called Blocks By Design. Fear of my limitations have kept me from completing the website I started a few months ago. (Next "to-do" is to conquer that fear) I have done several shows and love all the aspects of doing that...I create things people like and want AND I get to meet all kinds of new friends in the process. I've started murals on some walls, will be putting finishing touches on a window seat and shelf my sweet husband made for one of our daughters. I still don't really like to sew but I will if I really really HAVE to. There is something so exciting to see a finished project that you've created from as a choppy, unsanded 2X4 or blank wall.
I CAN'T SIT FOR VERY LONG
Is it possible to develop ADD as an adult? If so, I think I may have done it. I realized I have trouble sitting still for more than 20 minutes when I was attending a music festival in California for Memorial Weekend. I got a bit too excited about seeing so many kids around because it gave me an excuse to go run around with them. I had so much fun running around chatting with so many new friends, playing with the kids and dancing at night with my one super sweet young friend. Since then I've paid closer attention to my habits and how I need to always be doing something. I sub for our school secretaries and I love doing that so much! The hardest part of the job for me though is after all the work I've been given to do is done and then I just sit at the desk waiting to be needed by someone.
So, what I discovered in my personal re-discovery journey is this...I'm the same me, just older than I was before my hobbies were redirected to be "kid friendly." As a mom of 6 kids, 4 who still live at home; I love being around my family, I love getting the house clean in less than 4 hours-"helping hands" always takes longer, I love having "my time" a few hours a day to do things I had trouble doing when my babies were little. What I love the most about every day is when everyone is home sharing about their days and filling the house with laughter and happiness. That's a thing I don't think will ever change. So, bring on the summer and all the commotion, noise, laughter and happiness. That's what makes me, me...and I love it all!
As the school year started I thought a lot about my personal rediscovery. I've been a Stay At Home Mom for 21 years and have loved every single minute of it. Now that my youngest is in 2nd grade, I thought I'd finally take some time to find out what my interests are and what, if any, new hobbies I could find. Here's what I re-discovered about myself...
5. I can't sit still for very long.
I WORK BETTER UNDER STRESS
I found out pretty fast that I get more done and feel better if I have a list of "to-do's". This is nothing new. I just didn't realize it is part of me, regardless of how young or old my kids are. If I don't have a list of things to do or projects to start or finish then I just wander aimlessly until I find something to settle with. My kids teased me a few years ago when my youngest started kindergarten because I'd decided to start subbing in our schools, ran for School Board, had crazy ideas and goals to change the house--paint, rearrange, clean out closets...all at once.
I GENUINELY LIKE PEOPLE...all people, every where I go.
I've read behavior isn't genetic but I I truly think some behaviors might be. My biological father never met a stranger, my uncles have never met a stranger, my brother never meets a stranger and neither do I. My kids used to laugh at me because by the time we left the grocery store I had a new friend in the person behind me in line or with the cashier. I do miss not having babies with me as a conversation starter, but I've found that as life changes so do my conversations and conversation starters. When helping set my college kiddos up in their apartments, I've learned that this trait has been shared with them too....Who's laughing now?
I REALLY HAVE MISSED READING BOOKS, age appropriate books
I started a book club in my fun little town. The first month I was so excited to read just for me that I read the first two months of books we'd chosen. I've since learned to pace myself a bit better but oh how I love to read and learn! I also discovered that over the past 21 years my vocabulary has decreased a bit. I read the first book on my kindle and love that I can highlight words I don't know; I can even look up the definition right there on the spot! There were at least 15 words I learned in that book. I should report that book was about 400 pages because 15 words out of 400 pages sounds better than 15 words out of 80 pages. HA!
I STILL LIKE CREATING THINGS
I made a few things for my house and family and after friends saw them I kept hearing, "You should sell this!" So...after a few months of consideration (and lots of encouragement from husband and kiddos) I started a blocks craft business, called Blocks By Design. Fear of my limitations have kept me from completing the website I started a few months ago. (Next "to-do" is to conquer that fear) I have done several shows and love all the aspects of doing that...I create things people like and want AND I get to meet all kinds of new friends in the process. I've started murals on some walls, will be putting finishing touches on a window seat and shelf my sweet husband made for one of our daughters. I still don't really like to sew but I will if I really really HAVE to. There is something so exciting to see a finished project that you've created from as a choppy, unsanded 2X4 or blank wall.
I CAN'T SIT FOR VERY LONG
Is it possible to develop ADD as an adult? If so, I think I may have done it. I realized I have trouble sitting still for more than 20 minutes when I was attending a music festival in California for Memorial Weekend. I got a bit too excited about seeing so many kids around because it gave me an excuse to go run around with them. I had so much fun running around chatting with so many new friends, playing with the kids and dancing at night with my one super sweet young friend. Since then I've paid closer attention to my habits and how I need to always be doing something. I sub for our school secretaries and I love doing that so much! The hardest part of the job for me though is after all the work I've been given to do is done and then I just sit at the desk waiting to be needed by someone.
So, what I discovered in my personal re-discovery journey is this...I'm the same me, just older than I was before my hobbies were redirected to be "kid friendly." As a mom of 6 kids, 4 who still live at home; I love being around my family, I love getting the house clean in less than 4 hours-"helping hands" always takes longer, I love having "my time" a few hours a day to do things I had trouble doing when my babies were little. What I love the most about every day is when everyone is home sharing about their days and filling the house with laughter and happiness. That's a thing I don't think will ever change. So, bring on the summer and all the commotion, noise, laughter and happiness. That's what makes me, me...and I love it all!
Monday, February 9, 2015
Can't think of a proper title
This is written with a very heavy heart. Last night we found
out that the second teenage boy we knew and loved in our community committed
suicide. In my facebook news feed this morning I'm reading about "sleep
training" babies, babies sleeping or not sleeping with parents, etc.
My
advice for each and every new mom out there is this: Enjoy this time. I know
you're exhausted, I know you would love a minute of alone time, I know you'd
like to eat grown up food for lunch and not kids leftover PB&J. To have a
minute in the bathroom alone would be like a piece of Heaven on Earth. I get
it. I really do. I have 6 kids...they were all born within 2 1/2 years or less
of one another--my closest gap is 16 months. I remember struggling with sleep
times, colicky babies, potty training, weird rashes or viruses. I promise this
time does fly by so fast...so very fast. My oldest just turned 21, my second is
a freshman in college and my youngest is in 2nd grade. So I'm 7 years distanced
from the little baby time but I will tell you this time will pass before you
know it. The babies will figure out when and how to sleep, reading books is
great and I'm sure there are great methods out there but the bottom line is
this...love your babies, hold your babies. So what if they wake up at 1 am take
that extra minute to take in that sweet baby smell, and feel the softness of
their cheeks and necks, sing an extra song to them. You are not alone, I'm sure
you've felt alone so many times as you change your 30th diaper that day,
changed your clothes 5 times in a day yet hadn't had time to take a quick
shower. So many of us have struggled with what you're going through. Enjoy this
time.
This is a sweet innocent time and I pray that none of you will have to tell
your 15 yr old son that another friend has taken his life. This is something I
wish no one had to go through. My heart breaks for, my kids, friends, their mothers.
I went to a prayer meeting to meet up with my son last night. He'd been at a church youth
activity and I'd not seen him since I’d heard. I called my husband to tell him about our son’s friend so
that he could tell him when they were alone . After the prayer meeting I bee
lined for my son who was sitting with the soccer team. I said nothing to him,
just wrapped my arms around his still small shoulders and held him while we
cried together. As I was holding him, in my mind he was 2 years old and had
fallen down the last 4 stairs and I made him feel better. He was the 10 year old
that was bravely sitting on the table in the ER, holding my hand, while his
forehead was being glued from taking a soccer cleat to the head. He was my 15
yr old baby that was trying to comprehend how he'd lost 2 friends to suicide in
less than 2 weeks. Last night's hug didn't take away the pain like my hugs did
before. But they let him know he was surrounded by my love and was not alone.
So...hug your babies, let them sleep on your shoulder a few minutes longer
before you put them in their crib. Your dirty dishes, leftover lunch mess and
even a shower will be waiting for you when you have a minute to get to them.
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
The loss of one too young
This post is very different than the one I was writing in my head while driving home after a fun weekend with my brother. I was going to write about things I saw this weekend, how hard work is so worth every effort, my pride as a little sister, the love of my husband and babies.... After a text my son received late last night saying a friend had committed suicide this blog post took a different turn. I wasn't going to write at all today but writing is therapeutic and I pray it somehow reaches someone or helps someone that may need it right now.
The look on my sweet son's face last night was unfortunately, not a new one for us to see. The first friend he lost was in first grade. A horrific car accident took a classmates life. He's known others that have died way too young but no one he knew very well. Now he's a 15 yr old young man that has lost yet another friend. While I want so badly to help I am completely at a loss as to what to do. Nothing I do will ease anyone's pain for their loss. So we did what we do and opened our house for friends to come be together. Hunter had a few friends come over to cry, talk, laugh and just be together for a few hours. They were here until early morning hours and I am so glad they have each other.
This young man had so much talent and such a great life ahead of him. He suffered from depression and had demons he fought constantly. Depression is not something you can see on the outside. My hope from this post is that we learn, truly learn and get, that we don't know what others are dealing with. We don't know what goes on behind closed doors. We don't and can't know how our words and actions will truly affect someone.
The things I want to share here are these: Be kind. Be supportive. Take an extra minute to wait and listen to a response to the all too often rhetorical question, "how are you?" We pass people in the hallway at work or school and say, "hi. how are ya?" and move on, like it's a simple greeting. If someone looks a bit down, give them a smile or a touch on the arm or a quick hug. I once read we need 16 touches a day to survive. I don't think that's a physical survival but to remain emotionally and mentally alive and healthy we need to have some human, physical connection every day.
About 4 hours into my trip home yesterday I pulled into an Arby's parking lot and cried. I had pulled into a spot that had no one around so as not to look like a weirdo. An older man in a truck pulled up beside me to eat his sandwich. As I was wiping my eyes before getting out of the car this man caught my eye, gave me a smile and quick wave. He had no idea why I was crying, I'm not sure I did either, but his small gesture did not go unnoticed or unappreciated. I hope we follow this man's example and look around us. Reach out, smile and love those around us. You never know when you may change someone's day or maybe save a life.
RIP Blake Li. You touched so many lives and you will be missed.
The look on my sweet son's face last night was unfortunately, not a new one for us to see. The first friend he lost was in first grade. A horrific car accident took a classmates life. He's known others that have died way too young but no one he knew very well. Now he's a 15 yr old young man that has lost yet another friend. While I want so badly to help I am completely at a loss as to what to do. Nothing I do will ease anyone's pain for their loss. So we did what we do and opened our house for friends to come be together. Hunter had a few friends come over to cry, talk, laugh and just be together for a few hours. They were here until early morning hours and I am so glad they have each other.
This young man had so much talent and such a great life ahead of him. He suffered from depression and had demons he fought constantly. Depression is not something you can see on the outside. My hope from this post is that we learn, truly learn and get, that we don't know what others are dealing with. We don't know what goes on behind closed doors. We don't and can't know how our words and actions will truly affect someone.
The things I want to share here are these: Be kind. Be supportive. Take an extra minute to wait and listen to a response to the all too often rhetorical question, "how are you?" We pass people in the hallway at work or school and say, "hi. how are ya?" and move on, like it's a simple greeting. If someone looks a bit down, give them a smile or a touch on the arm or a quick hug. I once read we need 16 touches a day to survive. I don't think that's a physical survival but to remain emotionally and mentally alive and healthy we need to have some human, physical connection every day.
About 4 hours into my trip home yesterday I pulled into an Arby's parking lot and cried. I had pulled into a spot that had no one around so as not to look like a weirdo. An older man in a truck pulled up beside me to eat his sandwich. As I was wiping my eyes before getting out of the car this man caught my eye, gave me a smile and quick wave. He had no idea why I was crying, I'm not sure I did either, but his small gesture did not go unnoticed or unappreciated. I hope we follow this man's example and look around us. Reach out, smile and love those around us. You never know when you may change someone's day or maybe save a life.
RIP Blake Li. You touched so many lives and you will be missed.
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