Tonight I watched the movie, Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close. It was a slow movie and I nearly gave up on watching it but I'm so glad I stuck with it. It did have a slow moving pace and not a lighthearted funny movie but a movie that moved me and left me with thoughts about improving, doing better...just be more real. Taking more time to have real face to face encounters. The story unfolded at a pace we could enjoy each step along the path.
The movie was about this boy whose father died in one of the towers on 9/11. The boy found a key in his dad's closet that led him on a search to find what it would open. The boy meets 427 people and plans to spend only six minutes with each person on his search but he says each person wanted to talk and it took a lot longer for each stop on the search. As the credits rolled, I was left thinking that we all have stories. We may think our stories aren't interesting to others but they're our stories. How different would we be, our days be, our small part of the world be if we took time to have real face to face time? If we took time to really listen to someone as they share, "their story"?
Each job I've had has been a job where people are involved and around all the time. I've worked at an ice cream shack, as a cashier, a dressing room attendant, a bank teller, a daycare/preschool teacher.... my favorite job was being a waitress. (Being a mom is my favorite job, waiting tables was my favorite monetary/paying job) This job was my second job to help earn money faster for college. I loved that I met different people every day, I loved that as I took parents' orders I could help distract the younger kids by making faces or drawing doodles on their place mats. In short my favorite job was being out there, having face to face time and making connections with people. On occasion I'd have one of my "regulars" come sit in my section and I'd get the chance to ask and really listen to their story. I waited tables for only 6 months and it was 22 years ago but sometimes I still think of the blind man I served. As I put his plate down, I explained where things were on his plate and how grateful he was that I noticed he was blind without making an issue of it. The hostess seats customers and on busy evenings the waitress may not notice anything other than a new customer is at one of their tables. As I served him his meal I told him where his food was on his plate, "Your meatloaf is a 2 o'clock, mashed potatoes are at 9...", or the sweet, lonely widower that would come at 4:30 sharp every day and would ask for his favorite waitresses, in order, until one of us were there. His happy compliments and jokes always made us feel not so gross in our ugly, brown, polyester uniform and white nursing shoes. These people touched my life in a way they didn't even realize. They touched my life because I slowed down and looked up.
The movie I watched was a great reminder to look up from our phones,computers, Ipads, etc. and take a minute to slow down and really connect with people. When we say, "Hi. How are you?" stop and listen to their response. Chat with the cashier at the grocery store. Some of us spend a bit more time with the cashier each week but we all get a couple minutes with them. :) Slow down and look up! Don't be in such a hurry that we don't see the interesting people around with great stories to share. We all have stories. We can learn so much by listening to others' stories. We can have a richer life by hearing others' stories.
So stop reading this (just for today) and go pay attention to the real people around you. Really try to SEE the people you see every day. It adds happiness to our lives and who doesn't want to be happy?
Saturday, May 31, 2014
Thursday, May 29, 2014
MOM! We're bored, continued...
After my kids and husband read my last post, they chastised me not giving more ideas. I don't have pictures of other things we've done...well I do, but I don't have time to go digging for them. . My dad instilled in me a love for learning and I so love that we've done the same thing with our children. I personally, think a 12 week summer vacation is a bit too long. Even as a kid I remember being so very ready to get back to school and a routine the last couple weeks of summer. I think kids forget much of what they're taught at the end of the year when teachers are trying to get them ready for the next grade. It's been proven that not reading for that long does increase the chance for a child to either drop back in their reading skills or not advance like they were doing while in school. I'm not saying I hate long breaks. I love having my kids home for that long but it's encouraged me to find educational value in some of our surprise trips. Sometimes I have to really work at it to make learning fun but here are a few other ideas the kids thought I should've shared in the first post about summer ideas.
CEMETERIES
I know this is weird and maybe even morbid but I like cemeteries. I think it's interesting to see the different types of headstones....sizes, materials they're made with, epitaphs, etc. At least once a summer we go to an old cemetery that I find someplace and we walk around with papers of about 10 questions or scavenger hunt type things. Find the oldest person, the first person buried in the cemetery, the most damaged headstone, (and if we can we try to fix it...pull weeds, stand it back up), how many folks were in the military? The kids like this and sometimes when we're driving someplace one of them will notice a cemetery and tell me about it, "This one looks pretty old. We should go to this one."
MUSEUMS
There are unique museums we've gone to. There's a Popcorn Museum about an hour away from us. They have popcorn makers from the first kind ever made to microwave popcorn, they have old toys the kids can see and play with. That museum wasn't the most exciting and that's when I'm glad I was raised in the family I was...we don't often meet strangers. By the time we left, the old man was our new friend and as joking with the kids and walking us around the museum telling all kinds of fun tidbits. To tie it together, I had brought caramel and cheese popcorn to add to our picnic lunch at a nearby park. The following week I took the kids to the Popcorn Factory. There we saw how large quantities of popcorn was made with all the different flavors. They make about 90 different popcorn flavors. We tasted many the ones I remember most was blueberry popcorn, jalapeno pepper popcorn and then everyone got a small bag to bring home to eat when we have movie night with Jim that night.
YOUR OWN BACKYARD
I like seeing all the beauty in our "backyard" and for free! We've gone to nature hikes at metro parks, we've gone to this beautiful area called Clifton Mill, it's a got a gorge with a rich history. Again..I research the area, what we're seeing and as we go and if it's quiet, I'll share a fun piece of what I learned and it starts new conversations with the kids.
FARMS
Slate Run Farm, a living history museum based on early 1900s is a great place to go. I've also taken the older kids to a similar one in Colorado. I'm sure there's one in everyone's area. This farm is fun especially in the spring when animals have new babies. We once saw a lamb just minutes after it was born. We had to go back several times that summer because my oldest daughter wanted to see "her lamb". The workers there do fun things for the kids to either try or they show them. We've seen lambs sheered, the old school way--without electric trimmers, we've died eggs using all natural things like red onions and beets.
CHEAP ENTERTAINMENT
My husband grew up in Canada and is a huge hockey nut. When our kids are about 18 months old and stable on their feet, we take them ice skating. They all love to ice skate and watch hockey too. Our local ice rink has a "lunch skate" that is only about 1 1/2 hours long and is much cheaper than a night skate. So, I'll take the kids to go skate for an hour. They have their own skates and that saves us money too. Love those buy/sell sports stores! We've never paid more than $10 for a pair skates. Also we don't live too far away from OSU and tickets to their hockey games are much cheaper the Blue Jackets. Though, much to my 18 year olds sadness, fighting isn't allowed in college hockey. She would much rather watch an NHL game.
MAKING CHORES FUN
Cleaning and chores have to get done and honestly, who wants to be stuck inside on a nice summer day? I try to make chores a bit more exciting all the time but in the summer and on rainy days I make it a bit more exciting. I call the cleaning supplies "weapons" because they fight off germs. (This is actually a normal weekly thing we do but in the summer I'll have races or challenges.) The music gets turned up, (again normal thing!), and everyone draws a chore out of a cup and then they're given their 'weapon". Wipe off door knobs & lightswitches=Clorox wipes, dust all wood furniture=Swiffer, take trash all over house=trash bags and Lysol spray, etc. Tho their favorite chore to do is mop the floor in their socks. I hate doing this because it's a huge mess I have to clean up but the floor gets cleaner than it usually does because they will do this for a good hour. I get a bucket of cleaning water, they got mismatched socks I'm about to throw away. They jump in the water bucket and mop the floor. Again, music is usually blasting, kids are sliding around, dancing, splashing all over the place. But they have fun, squabbles don't happen and I get all the tiled areas cleaned.
Again, these are just some more fun ideas that work for us. Go plan some fun things for your family to do before they get home from school and start telling you're "I'm bored." Have fun making happy summer memories with your family.
CEMETERIES
I know this is weird and maybe even morbid but I like cemeteries. I think it's interesting to see the different types of headstones....sizes, materials they're made with, epitaphs, etc. At least once a summer we go to an old cemetery that I find someplace and we walk around with papers of about 10 questions or scavenger hunt type things. Find the oldest person, the first person buried in the cemetery, the most damaged headstone, (and if we can we try to fix it...pull weeds, stand it back up), how many folks were in the military? The kids like this and sometimes when we're driving someplace one of them will notice a cemetery and tell me about it, "This one looks pretty old. We should go to this one."
MUSEUMS
There are unique museums we've gone to. There's a Popcorn Museum about an hour away from us. They have popcorn makers from the first kind ever made to microwave popcorn, they have old toys the kids can see and play with. That museum wasn't the most exciting and that's when I'm glad I was raised in the family I was...we don't often meet strangers. By the time we left, the old man was our new friend and as joking with the kids and walking us around the museum telling all kinds of fun tidbits. To tie it together, I had brought caramel and cheese popcorn to add to our picnic lunch at a nearby park. The following week I took the kids to the Popcorn Factory. There we saw how large quantities of popcorn was made with all the different flavors. They make about 90 different popcorn flavors. We tasted many the ones I remember most was blueberry popcorn, jalapeno pepper popcorn and then everyone got a small bag to bring home to eat when we have movie night with Jim that night.
YOUR OWN BACKYARD
I like seeing all the beauty in our "backyard" and for free! We've gone to nature hikes at metro parks, we've gone to this beautiful area called Clifton Mill, it's a got a gorge with a rich history. Again..I research the area, what we're seeing and as we go and if it's quiet, I'll share a fun piece of what I learned and it starts new conversations with the kids.
FARMS
Slate Run Farm, a living history museum based on early 1900s is a great place to go. I've also taken the older kids to a similar one in Colorado. I'm sure there's one in everyone's area. This farm is fun especially in the spring when animals have new babies. We once saw a lamb just minutes after it was born. We had to go back several times that summer because my oldest daughter wanted to see "her lamb". The workers there do fun things for the kids to either try or they show them. We've seen lambs sheered, the old school way--without electric trimmers, we've died eggs using all natural things like red onions and beets.
CHEAP ENTERTAINMENT
My husband grew up in Canada and is a huge hockey nut. When our kids are about 18 months old and stable on their feet, we take them ice skating. They all love to ice skate and watch hockey too. Our local ice rink has a "lunch skate" that is only about 1 1/2 hours long and is much cheaper than a night skate. So, I'll take the kids to go skate for an hour. They have their own skates and that saves us money too. Love those buy/sell sports stores! We've never paid more than $10 for a pair skates. Also we don't live too far away from OSU and tickets to their hockey games are much cheaper the Blue Jackets. Though, much to my 18 year olds sadness, fighting isn't allowed in college hockey. She would much rather watch an NHL game.
MAKING CHORES FUN
Cleaning and chores have to get done and honestly, who wants to be stuck inside on a nice summer day? I try to make chores a bit more exciting all the time but in the summer and on rainy days I make it a bit more exciting. I call the cleaning supplies "weapons" because they fight off germs. (This is actually a normal weekly thing we do but in the summer I'll have races or challenges.) The music gets turned up, (again normal thing!), and everyone draws a chore out of a cup and then they're given their 'weapon". Wipe off door knobs & lightswitches=Clorox wipes, dust all wood furniture=Swiffer, take trash all over house=trash bags and Lysol spray, etc. Tho their favorite chore to do is mop the floor in their socks. I hate doing this because it's a huge mess I have to clean up but the floor gets cleaner than it usually does because they will do this for a good hour. I get a bucket of cleaning water, they got mismatched socks I'm about to throw away. They jump in the water bucket and mop the floor. Again, music is usually blasting, kids are sliding around, dancing, splashing all over the place. But they have fun, squabbles don't happen and I get all the tiled areas cleaned.
Again, these are just some more fun ideas that work for us. Go plan some fun things for your family to do before they get home from school and start telling you're "I'm bored." Have fun making happy summer memories with your family.
Tuesday, May 27, 2014
MOM! We're bored....
This week marks the end of the school year and the beginning of summer. This time is fun and exciting for both kids and parents but I think I'm safe in saying that most parents have a fair amount of nervous anticipation about this week. The kids are home 24/7 now and mom's role has gone from homework helper, chore enforcer and taxi driver to full time short order cook, entertainment committee, referee...the list can go on and on. We do these things all the time but in the summer we are ALL that, ALL the time.
In my picture search, which I will write a post about and share what I've learned later this week, I found pictures of our past summer activities. I thought I'd post them here and share ideas to help other moms and dads that are feeling the way I do as a fun summer vacation starts.
One of the things I do the first week of summer is to sit down with the kids and we make a reading challenge. One year we decided if that we, as a family, read 40 books by a certain date, we'd go to Kings Island--one of our local theme parks. When our goal was met, the kids had a meeting without us knowing and then informed us they wanted a Wii instead of a trip to Kings Island. "Instead of one day of family fun, we can have family fun all the time!...AND it's cheaper!" Who can argue with that?! Another year we went camping, we went to Lake Erie, etc. After our challenge has been decided, we go to our local library and sign up for the summer reading program. This is a more fun thing for the younger kids because many of the toys and trinkets are geared for younger kiddos. I'm excited about this because after 20 years of motherhood all of us can FINALLY ride bikes to the library and without training wheels too!! I love that all but one of my kids loves to read. I won't get on a big soapbox here about reading but I will say that I think if a child learns to read at a young age, other things in life come a bit easier. Imagination, vocabulary, quick thinking, even math. We've always had a specific place in our house just for reading. In my dream home, I will have a whole room as a library with bookshelves from the floor to the ceiling.
I take the kids on what we call "surprise trips". I have two very cool books about Ohio that I use to find fun, unique and kid friendly things to do. With a 12 year age gap, I always worry about losing interest in either the younger kids or the older kids and for different reasons. I am so happy to say that for the most part all the kids are pretty happy with everything we've done. I believe it's the in the delivery of the trip news and the attitude of the parent. Sometimes I'll enlist the help of one of my older daughters so they can help rally the troops. I found pictures of some of my favorite things we've done. I'll post them below with descriptions. Lots of them are free, most are very inexpensive and only a few have I paid for and had to actually budget for them. I also have a travel time limit, but now that my youngest is 7, the age my oldest was when I started doing these, I can lengthen that travel time. When we wake up the morning I've decided we're going, I yell, "surprise trip!" I've packed the car ahead of time and have movies, activities or games ready for the length of trip. Once we're all in the car I give them three letters as clues. The letters usually are the name of the location, what we will see or the town we are going. My favorite trip was to see 2 castles. I gave the letters, C, Q, K...Kings and Queens live in Castles. For the zoo I would give everything but Z... A, E, S--apes, elephants, snakes. The kids play 20 questions..sometimes it's 10 questions and others it's 50 to guess where we're going. The chatter I hear from the backseats are often so worth keeping it a secret.
For a family our size, it's quite often cheaper to buy a season pass than to pay to go in just once. Our zoo, for instance is costs us $75 or $85 to go once, while a zoo pass for our family is $90 (or was last year) but we can go in for a couple hours and not worry about the money we spent for just an hour or two. And passes like this are often reciprocal and can be used to get in free or a huge discount at other zoos or museums.
I always struggle with a pool pass. Our town pool passes increased in price this year and I have trouble paying that for only 2 months of swimming. June is often too cold to swim or the water hasn't warmed up yet and the kids won't go in. However, it is a very nice bribe to get the kids moving on their "lazy" days. "We will go swimming after you've picked up the yard, mowed the lawn." "Weeded your part of the garden." "Tidied your room...." I will probably break down and buy a pool pass but I do struggle with it every summer, especially when the kids start begging to go. Who wants to be the mean mom, really?
On rainy days or when the kids start getting crabby with one another I will have a bake off with them. All of my kids can cook and even Nate (7) knows the very basics of cooking. I will somehow team the kids up and then let them raid cookbooks & the internet for whatever theme I've offered. They make a list of what they need, we go shopping if we need to, and they start baking. I supervise the fun and then we enlist Jim and sweet neighbors to be the judges. The kids think this is the most fun of all. The "boys" always make a big deal of testing everything and being official.
I hope this helps start the creative juices flowing with others that are trying find ways to keep summer fun, cheap, happy and the sibling squabbles to a minimum. Summer is a great time to make happy memories. Start now!!
In my picture search, which I will write a post about and share what I've learned later this week, I found pictures of our past summer activities. I thought I'd post them here and share ideas to help other moms and dads that are feeling the way I do as a fun summer vacation starts.
One of the things I do the first week of summer is to sit down with the kids and we make a reading challenge. One year we decided if that we, as a family, read 40 books by a certain date, we'd go to Kings Island--one of our local theme parks. When our goal was met, the kids had a meeting without us knowing and then informed us they wanted a Wii instead of a trip to Kings Island. "Instead of one day of family fun, we can have family fun all the time!...AND it's cheaper!" Who can argue with that?! Another year we went camping, we went to Lake Erie, etc. After our challenge has been decided, we go to our local library and sign up for the summer reading program. This is a more fun thing for the younger kids because many of the toys and trinkets are geared for younger kiddos. I'm excited about this because after 20 years of motherhood all of us can FINALLY ride bikes to the library and without training wheels too!! I love that all but one of my kids loves to read. I won't get on a big soapbox here about reading but I will say that I think if a child learns to read at a young age, other things in life come a bit easier. Imagination, vocabulary, quick thinking, even math. We've always had a specific place in our house just for reading. In my dream home, I will have a whole room as a library with bookshelves from the floor to the ceiling.
reading room is an alcove in big girls' room. Cornice above window is our favorite bookcovers photocopied & decoupaged onto the wood.
homemade bookshelves copied from Ikea spice racks.
Ikea was sold out, so we made our own version
Painted on one of the reading room walls is one of my favorite quotes,
from one of my fav Dr. Seuss books. Oh The Places You'll Go
I take the kids on what we call "surprise trips". I have two very cool books about Ohio that I use to find fun, unique and kid friendly things to do. With a 12 year age gap, I always worry about losing interest in either the younger kids or the older kids and for different reasons. I am so happy to say that for the most part all the kids are pretty happy with everything we've done. I believe it's the in the delivery of the trip news and the attitude of the parent. Sometimes I'll enlist the help of one of my older daughters so they can help rally the troops. I found pictures of some of my favorite things we've done. I'll post them below with descriptions. Lots of them are free, most are very inexpensive and only a few have I paid for and had to actually budget for them. I also have a travel time limit, but now that my youngest is 7, the age my oldest was when I started doing these, I can lengthen that travel time. When we wake up the morning I've decided we're going, I yell, "surprise trip!" I've packed the car ahead of time and have movies, activities or games ready for the length of trip. Once we're all in the car I give them three letters as clues. The letters usually are the name of the location, what we will see or the town we are going. My favorite trip was to see 2 castles. I gave the letters, C, Q, K...Kings and Queens live in Castles. For the zoo I would give everything but Z... A, E, S--apes, elephants, snakes. The kids play 20 questions..sometimes it's 10 questions and others it's 50 to guess where we're going. The chatter I hear from the backseats are often so worth keeping it a secret.
Mac O Cheek Castle, West Liberty, Ohio
super cool place! And the Ohio Carverns are nearby, literally a cool place
For a family our size, it's quite often cheaper to buy a season pass than to pay to go in just once. Our zoo, for instance is costs us $75 or $85 to go once, while a zoo pass for our family is $90 (or was last year) but we can go in for a couple hours and not worry about the money we spent for just an hour or two. And passes like this are often reciprocal and can be used to get in free or a huge discount at other zoos or museums.
Natural museum of history and petting zoo,Cleveland
Sometimes just pitching the tent in the backyard creates hours of happiness.
This was taken several yrs ago. I can't find recent pix of tent fun.
I always struggle with a pool pass. Our town pool passes increased in price this year and I have trouble paying that for only 2 months of swimming. June is often too cold to swim or the water hasn't warmed up yet and the kids won't go in. However, it is a very nice bribe to get the kids moving on their "lazy" days. "We will go swimming after you've picked up the yard, mowed the lawn." "Weeded your part of the garden." "Tidied your room...." I will probably break down and buy a pool pass but I do struggle with it every summer, especially when the kids start begging to go. Who wants to be the mean mom, really?
On rainy days or when the kids start getting crabby with one another I will have a bake off with them. All of my kids can cook and even Nate (7) knows the very basics of cooking. I will somehow team the kids up and then let them raid cookbooks & the internet for whatever theme I've offered. They make a list of what they need, we go shopping if we need to, and they start baking. I supervise the fun and then we enlist Jim and sweet neighbors to be the judges. The kids think this is the most fun of all. The "boys" always make a big deal of testing everything and being official.
Making chocolate magic.
the judging begins! This time the theme was raspberry.
Things to judge: a raspberry drink, lemon raspberry crepes, chocolate raspberry tart.
I hope this helps start the creative juices flowing with others that are trying find ways to keep summer fun, cheap, happy and the sibling squabbles to a minimum. Summer is a great time to make happy memories. Start now!!
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
The old lady was right
I think today I'm using this blog as an escape from reality. My "normal" reality is that I've got six amazing kids,(I know I'm biased but they really are pretty great). I have an amazing husband that has the energy of 20 men. I have a house I try to keep tidy or at the very least germ free and a yard that has so much landscaping it overwhelms me. I have 5 chickens that I like to watch be stupid together, a cat that I really don't like but my kids do, so he stays because I love my kids more than I dislike cats. My "this week" reality is: we have family coming for our daughter's high school graduation, several nights of concerts and award programs, softball practices and games, mom taxi service, overnight camping/hiking trip this weekend. I have an empty pantry and laundry that I've not done for a couple days. I told my husband our laundry is more fertile than I am! I put two towels together and next thing I know I've got 2 big piles of just bathroom laundry.This blog is definitely serving as my land of denial.
I've been editing senior pictures, cleaning off SD cards and organizing picture files in my computer for the past few weeks. It's fun but a bit weird seeing our lives change in Kodak moments. I'm often asked, "how do you do it?" My honest answer is that I don't know, most of the time. I go on autopilot and just get things done. I wake up running and don't stop running until I stop around 11 when I try to watch the news but usually doze off while it's on. The kids make fun of me for falling asleep watching tv. Maybe I have a form of narcolepsy...when I stop moving I fall asleep.
In these pictures I see a bunch of kids hanging on me or Jim with big, happy smiles. I see pictures of kids holding their new baby sibling, kids with casts, swollen eyes from bee stings or running into something that got in their way, water babies, hiking babies, bike riding babies. I see me and Jim so happy and busy and think I don't know how we did it. And it makes me a bit sad to realize how very fast it went. I remember those days like yesterday and I remember thinking during the gnarly moments, "one day this will pass." Sweet older ladies would smile at me as I have my momma duck line going someplace and they'd say, "enjoy this time. It goes by so fast." I would smile and thank them for their advice but would think, "it sure doesn't seem like it's going by fast"
One day I was taking my then 5 kids to the library to sign up for summer reading. I'm carrying the car seat, with 3 week old Becca, I have my 2 year old holding the other side of the car seat. explaining to her (more like begging her to not let go so I don't have to chase her with my brood following) "mommy needs help, will you please keep the baby safe with me?" Then I have 3 year old protective Hunter keeping her safe by squeezing Natalie's hand, Courtney's got a death grip on Hunter's hand (she's my rule abider. I said don't let go of hands. There was NO way she was going to break the rule.) and 7 year old Kara at the other end being the "other responsible adult" in the line. I realized we had taken up the whole lane in the parking lot when I heard a car idling behind us. I looked back and smiled at the driver as the she patiently waited for us to get out of her way. In that 2 second head turn all hell had broken loose. I'm sure the lady saw what was happening and wasn't smiling at me but at what she was watching take place. 2 year old Natalie trips and falls, skinning her knee, Hunter freaks out because he's sees blood; Courtney, refusing to let go of Hunter's hand, squeezes harder and he starts crying because "she's hurting me." I turn to Kara as calmly as I could and handed her the car seat, "go directly to the bench and wait for me. Look both ways as you leave the parking lot." She says, "I got this mom" and as I turn away from her to pick up wounded Natalie, calm Hunter, "it's just a scratch, there's no big cut." and try to explain to Courtney that "I have Hunter's hand now, it's okay to pleeeeease let go of him." Meanwhile the lady in the van has put the car in park and is now talking to her child in the backseat. This is when this sweet old lady pats me on the back and says, "enjoy this time. It goes by so fast." She was right, it did. Now I'm the lady telling moms how fast the time goes.
I'm embracing this new season of life without as many daytime interruptions but I do miss the laughter of a little kid, sitting and reading to a toddler that still giggles as we both say "I will not eat green eggs and ham...", the pitter patter of little feet on the floor, the cute grunts of a baby that can't talk but I know that particular grunt means they want a drink. I rush around during the day to get as much done I can so that at 2:40, when my first bus rider comes home, I can hear all about their day and laugh with them as they tell me their stories. That's now my favorite time of day, we talk and laugh together before the crazy evening schedules take over.
And now I must stop avoiding and go to the grocery store so I can feed my brood. I will try to find the happy in shopping!
I've been editing senior pictures, cleaning off SD cards and organizing picture files in my computer for the past few weeks. It's fun but a bit weird seeing our lives change in Kodak moments. I'm often asked, "how do you do it?" My honest answer is that I don't know, most of the time. I go on autopilot and just get things done. I wake up running and don't stop running until I stop around 11 when I try to watch the news but usually doze off while it's on. The kids make fun of me for falling asleep watching tv. Maybe I have a form of narcolepsy...when I stop moving I fall asleep.
In these pictures I see a bunch of kids hanging on me or Jim with big, happy smiles. I see pictures of kids holding their new baby sibling, kids with casts, swollen eyes from bee stings or running into something that got in their way, water babies, hiking babies, bike riding babies. I see me and Jim so happy and busy and think I don't know how we did it. And it makes me a bit sad to realize how very fast it went. I remember those days like yesterday and I remember thinking during the gnarly moments, "one day this will pass." Sweet older ladies would smile at me as I have my momma duck line going someplace and they'd say, "enjoy this time. It goes by so fast." I would smile and thank them for their advice but would think, "it sure doesn't seem like it's going by fast"
One day I was taking my then 5 kids to the library to sign up for summer reading. I'm carrying the car seat, with 3 week old Becca, I have my 2 year old holding the other side of the car seat. explaining to her (more like begging her to not let go so I don't have to chase her with my brood following) "mommy needs help, will you please keep the baby safe with me?" Then I have 3 year old protective Hunter keeping her safe by squeezing Natalie's hand, Courtney's got a death grip on Hunter's hand (she's my rule abider. I said don't let go of hands. There was NO way she was going to break the rule.) and 7 year old Kara at the other end being the "other responsible adult" in the line. I realized we had taken up the whole lane in the parking lot when I heard a car idling behind us. I looked back and smiled at the driver as the she patiently waited for us to get out of her way. In that 2 second head turn all hell had broken loose. I'm sure the lady saw what was happening and wasn't smiling at me but at what she was watching take place. 2 year old Natalie trips and falls, skinning her knee, Hunter freaks out because he's sees blood; Courtney, refusing to let go of Hunter's hand, squeezes harder and he starts crying because "she's hurting me." I turn to Kara as calmly as I could and handed her the car seat, "go directly to the bench and wait for me. Look both ways as you leave the parking lot." She says, "I got this mom" and as I turn away from her to pick up wounded Natalie, calm Hunter, "it's just a scratch, there's no big cut." and try to explain to Courtney that "I have Hunter's hand now, it's okay to pleeeeease let go of him." Meanwhile the lady in the van has put the car in park and is now talking to her child in the backseat. This is when this sweet old lady pats me on the back and says, "enjoy this time. It goes by so fast." She was right, it did. Now I'm the lady telling moms how fast the time goes.
I'm embracing this new season of life without as many daytime interruptions but I do miss the laughter of a little kid, sitting and reading to a toddler that still giggles as we both say "I will not eat green eggs and ham...", the pitter patter of little feet on the floor, the cute grunts of a baby that can't talk but I know that particular grunt means they want a drink. I rush around during the day to get as much done I can so that at 2:40, when my first bus rider comes home, I can hear all about their day and laugh with them as they tell me their stories. That's now my favorite time of day, we talk and laugh together before the crazy evening schedules take over.
And now I must stop avoiding and go to the grocery store so I can feed my brood. I will try to find the happy in shopping!
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Laughter is good for the soul
When Jim got home from work yesterday he gave me a dozen roses and proudly exclaims "There's a card in there too." I looked inside...no card. It went missing between the store and my hands. He told me the card said, "I love you and I love that you make me laugh every day." I love that he brings me flowers for no reason. I love that after nearly 22 years, I still make him laugh (quite often it's just from my clumsiness), I love that laughter is a normal, every day noise we have in our home.
We'd been dating a couple months when we had our first "fight" though it was more of a disagreement/discussion...and I was clearly winning. Jim stops mid sentence and says, "you know what this is?" No. "It's our first fight!" How could I continue to try to win after that? We both laughed at the silliness of the moment. It was a ridiculous thing to fight over...because I'd already won. It was over a girl...or rather a picture of a girl....and yep, I won! ;)
Laughter has been a bit part of us since we started. I'm so happy laughter continues in our home every day. Our house is filled with kids all the time, and not just our own crew. Last weekend we had a party with about 15 teenagers here. We couldn't help but smile and laugh along with these great kids. I don't know how much weight a sofa can hold but they sure tested it out with an entire group dog pile.
Laughter and a good sense of humor are so very important to survival, in my opinion. Laughter really does heal the soul, I've read articles in medical magazines that discuss attitude and sense of humor helping the physical healing process. It discussed how two patients with the same diagnosis react differently. Both were given the same medicine and in about the same physical shape, the biggest difference was that one had a more positive nature and a good sense of humor than the patient that is quite often serious and laughs less.
Laughter is almost always good. I sometimes laugh at the wrong times and the more I try to stop, the more I laugh. When I was 17 I got in so much trouble for something, I forget what I did but whatever it was really upset my dad. He was giving my list of punishments and threats and the angrier he got the redder his face got, the more his head shook. I knew I shouldn't be laughing and I really tried to stop. I was even biting the inside of my mouth. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my mom shaking her head but she was laughing at me too. I'd backed up against the wall and my dad walked closer and poked his finger in my chest and said, "Do you understand me young lady?!" I tried so hard to swallow my nervous laughter but as I opened my mouth a laugh escaped so I closed it again and just shook my head. Finally, mom came to my rescue. She was a bit better at controlling laughter that I was. She put her hand on my dad's arm and said, "I think she gets it. Let her go to her room and think about it." I then went in my room and cried, thinking "why couldn't THIS have been my reaction!"
There's a song in Mary Poppins called, I Love to Laugh. Mary takes the kids to see her uncle who he laughs all the time. He tells jokes to make the kids laugh and they all float to the ceiling. The more they laugh, the higher they go. I love the visual...the more we laugh, the higher our spirits go, the happier our moods become. The song is about different kinds of laughs. That is by far my favorite song from Mary Poppins. I think I want that on my epitaph. "She loves to laugh"
Laughter is one of my favorite sounds. I'm not as funny as my brother, or no longer as outwardly goofy as my son but I love to make others laugh. If I tell a story that makes someone laugh, it warms my heart. For years, I'd look up dumb jokes, the dumber the better, and share them with my family at dinner. Now Courtney, my soon to be high school graduate, has taken over that role. Her jokes are great the only problem is we can rarely understand the punch line because she's laughing too hard for us to understand it. And it's okay because the end result is to get us to laugh, which we do...just at her and not the joke.
Here's a video of my Becca. She's the happiest 10 year old I know. Every year when her teachers and friends write notes to her, the notes are always something about her giggle. I hope she never loses her sweet, free, open, giggle. What she's laughing at are her brothers. Hunter is laying on his back reading and Nate sees an opportunity to tackle. He jumps on Hunter's stomach who has decided to make up a song about Nate. Laughter + music= our happy noises.
I hope you find something to laugh about today. I mean really laugh about. A full on belly laugh, one that you have to take a deep cleansing breath to recover from. Those are the best kind of laughs.
We'd been dating a couple months when we had our first "fight" though it was more of a disagreement/discussion...and I was clearly winning. Jim stops mid sentence and says, "you know what this is?" No. "It's our first fight!" How could I continue to try to win after that? We both laughed at the silliness of the moment. It was a ridiculous thing to fight over...because I'd already won. It was over a girl...or rather a picture of a girl....and yep, I won! ;)
Laughter has been a bit part of us since we started. I'm so happy laughter continues in our home every day. Our house is filled with kids all the time, and not just our own crew. Last weekend we had a party with about 15 teenagers here. We couldn't help but smile and laugh along with these great kids. I don't know how much weight a sofa can hold but they sure tested it out with an entire group dog pile.
Laughter and a good sense of humor are so very important to survival, in my opinion. Laughter really does heal the soul, I've read articles in medical magazines that discuss attitude and sense of humor helping the physical healing process. It discussed how two patients with the same diagnosis react differently. Both were given the same medicine and in about the same physical shape, the biggest difference was that one had a more positive nature and a good sense of humor than the patient that is quite often serious and laughs less.
Laughter is almost always good. I sometimes laugh at the wrong times and the more I try to stop, the more I laugh. When I was 17 I got in so much trouble for something, I forget what I did but whatever it was really upset my dad. He was giving my list of punishments and threats and the angrier he got the redder his face got, the more his head shook. I knew I shouldn't be laughing and I really tried to stop. I was even biting the inside of my mouth. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my mom shaking her head but she was laughing at me too. I'd backed up against the wall and my dad walked closer and poked his finger in my chest and said, "Do you understand me young lady?!" I tried so hard to swallow my nervous laughter but as I opened my mouth a laugh escaped so I closed it again and just shook my head. Finally, mom came to my rescue. She was a bit better at controlling laughter that I was. She put her hand on my dad's arm and said, "I think she gets it. Let her go to her room and think about it." I then went in my room and cried, thinking "why couldn't THIS have been my reaction!"
There's a song in Mary Poppins called, I Love to Laugh. Mary takes the kids to see her uncle who he laughs all the time. He tells jokes to make the kids laugh and they all float to the ceiling. The more they laugh, the higher they go. I love the visual...the more we laugh, the higher our spirits go, the happier our moods become. The song is about different kinds of laughs. That is by far my favorite song from Mary Poppins. I think I want that on my epitaph. "She loves to laugh"
Laughter is one of my favorite sounds. I'm not as funny as my brother, or no longer as outwardly goofy as my son but I love to make others laugh. If I tell a story that makes someone laugh, it warms my heart. For years, I'd look up dumb jokes, the dumber the better, and share them with my family at dinner. Now Courtney, my soon to be high school graduate, has taken over that role. Her jokes are great the only problem is we can rarely understand the punch line because she's laughing too hard for us to understand it. And it's okay because the end result is to get us to laugh, which we do...just at her and not the joke.
Here's a video of my Becca. She's the happiest 10 year old I know. Every year when her teachers and friends write notes to her, the notes are always something about her giggle. I hope she never loses her sweet, free, open, giggle. What she's laughing at are her brothers. Hunter is laying on his back reading and Nate sees an opportunity to tackle. He jumps on Hunter's stomach who has decided to make up a song about Nate. Laughter + music= our happy noises.
I hope you find something to laugh about today. I mean really laugh about. A full on belly laugh, one that you have to take a deep cleansing breath to recover from. Those are the best kind of laughs.
Thursday, May 15, 2014
How did that happen?
After shopping for my daughter's graduation party today I loaded the back of my Suburban and cracked my shin pretty hard on the hitch...not the hitch but the adapter thingy. The hitch wasn't even put on the Suburban. As I grabbed my leg and tried not to use every expletive I knew ,I started laughing at the following trip down memory lane.....
When I was a little girl, I was so very clumsy. I remember one summer night my brother dragged me in the bathroom and decided to get my arms and legs clean. "You're so dirty Tiff! When was the last time you took a bath?!" As I'm screaming & yelling from the scrub down, my mom walks to the bathroom door and tries not to laugh. She quietly whispers something in Ron's ear. He says, "Oh." turns the water off, tosses me a towel and walks away leaving me with my mom. I'm sure she's going to do the same thing. I knew I had a bath the night before and that it wasn't dirt, they were bruises. Mom kisses my "boo boos", then dries my legs and asks what happened. This was the first of many times she'd ask this question.
I don't remember my answer that time but I do remember long stories of excitement about the fun we had running around town, riding-or should I say crashing-my bike, rolling down the hill that led to the creek....THIS was a BIG no no but I later found out my brother went to the same spot along the creek and neither of us ever told mom. (this is not to give my own children ideas!). The bottom line was this...at the end of the day I always had fun stories to tell and I always, always had bruises I had no idea how they got there.
One day I ran into the edge of the counter and had an A-HA moment. I ran in to tell my mom I finally had an answer! "The bruise on my hip is from YOUR dumb counter! I always run into it!" She busted up laughing and asked me how long that counter had been there..."all my life"... she laughed harder.
Fast forward a few decades and here I am today holding my shin that is throbbing and has some skin torn off. I look down at my shins and notice for the first time, they are incredibly bumpy, from years of cracking my shins on anything at the perfect height.
One of my many nicknames as a kid was Grace. Mom started calling me that shortly after she started asking me "what happened?" She told me it was because I lacked grace and coordination. Some things really don't change. After years of trying, I did master walking in high heels but I'm still unable to approach anything at shin height without doing some damage and I'm sure causing laughter from anyone who's fortunate to see my gracefulness in action. I'm always glad to be able to entertain and bring happiness to someone else's day, even if it's unintentional. Stick around, I'm sure I'll trip, fall or bang my shin on something again today.
When I was a little girl, I was so very clumsy. I remember one summer night my brother dragged me in the bathroom and decided to get my arms and legs clean. "You're so dirty Tiff! When was the last time you took a bath?!" As I'm screaming & yelling from the scrub down, my mom walks to the bathroom door and tries not to laugh. She quietly whispers something in Ron's ear. He says, "Oh." turns the water off, tosses me a towel and walks away leaving me with my mom. I'm sure she's going to do the same thing. I knew I had a bath the night before and that it wasn't dirt, they were bruises. Mom kisses my "boo boos", then dries my legs and asks what happened. This was the first of many times she'd ask this question.
I don't remember my answer that time but I do remember long stories of excitement about the fun we had running around town, riding-or should I say crashing-my bike, rolling down the hill that led to the creek....THIS was a BIG no no but I later found out my brother went to the same spot along the creek and neither of us ever told mom. (this is not to give my own children ideas!). The bottom line was this...at the end of the day I always had fun stories to tell and I always, always had bruises I had no idea how they got there.
One day I ran into the edge of the counter and had an A-HA moment. I ran in to tell my mom I finally had an answer! "The bruise on my hip is from YOUR dumb counter! I always run into it!" She busted up laughing and asked me how long that counter had been there..."all my life"... she laughed harder.
Fast forward a few decades and here I am today holding my shin that is throbbing and has some skin torn off. I look down at my shins and notice for the first time, they are incredibly bumpy, from years of cracking my shins on anything at the perfect height.
One of my many nicknames as a kid was Grace. Mom started calling me that shortly after she started asking me "what happened?" She told me it was because I lacked grace and coordination. Some things really don't change. After years of trying, I did master walking in high heels but I'm still unable to approach anything at shin height without doing some damage and I'm sure causing laughter from anyone who's fortunate to see my gracefulness in action. I'm always glad to be able to entertain and bring happiness to someone else's day, even if it's unintentional. Stick around, I'm sure I'll trip, fall or bang my shin on something again today.
Sunday, May 11, 2014
The benefits of being a Foster Family.
As Mother's Day has been approaching this week my thoughts have naturally been of my own mother but also about all the other mother's I've had and still have in my life. I've also been thinking about me as a young mother and the things I'd ask my oldest daughter to do compared to what I ask my now 7 yr old son to do.
My parents were foster parents for 9 or 10 years when I was growing up. I loved being involved when I was a kid but it was years later that I gained full appreciation for that experience and the opportunity it gave me to grow as a future mom. The heart breaking moments were when I'd watch my mom cry for days over a foster child going back to their mom. Just because they weren't living with us anymore didn't mean she quit worrying and praying for them. These kids all grew to love her and call her mom. She treated them just like she did my brother and myself and they had the same expectations we had. I got to see how excited she was when a 12 year old girl moved in with us and she was reading at a second grade level. By the beginning of the school year this girl was reading at her appropriate grade level. My mom was so proud of this young girl, who was the same age I was. I think she was my favorite foster sister. Probably because I had a built in friend to always hang out with. We did argue like sisters but it always ended with an apology and laughter, usually strongly encouraged by mom. Had it not been for my parents fostering others' babies until they were ready to, I wouldn't have learned how to do the basic baby or child care. I learned how to calm down a crying baby, change diapers, the unpleasant job of washing cloth diapers, how to patiently solve children disputes, how to unconditionally love every child.
By natural birth order, I'm the baby. I was reading the Birth Order book a few years ago. I initially read it as a mother, but then started reading it as a child. I found it a very interesting book. It says that after a four year gap, the next child will have the first born characteristics. Which explains why my brother and I have many typical first born personality traits. We are both protective of one another and our families, we are ambitious, if there's a problem in a situation--we are not afraid to find a solution and try it out. If there's something we want or need to do, we find a way to do it or get it done. Having foster siblings I was not only the baby of the family and after my brother moved out, I was the only child at home; I had the opportunity to be the oldest, only, youngest and middle child. As I read the Birth Order Book, it was so interesting to me how I could relate with each birth order and the "difficulties and successes" they can have in a family. Had it not been for my parents being foster parents I wouldn't have learned as much as I did in life, as a child, about parenting, about loving others and doing good in the world and not expecting anything in return.
When my oldest daughter, Kara, was 7 she was the oldest of four babies. I relied on her to be my extra arms when I went someplace. "Kara can you push the stroller while I carry the car seat and diaperbag and hold so and so's hand?" She would always happily jump in line and push the stroller, she rarely complained about doing a chore for me or helping pick up toys her younger siblings threw around. Nate, my now 7 year old son, has never pushed a stroller, helped change a diaper, entertained a younger sibling while I make dinner or get a quick shower. I love each of my children fiercely and just as much as I love the next one. I love different things about each one too. While Nate is the baby of the family, he does things that Kara didn't need to or have the opportunity to do. We were a young family and didn't have much money when she was little. Jim was still in college, we were still finding our way in life. She had 2 years with me 24/7. She doesn't remember those years but she didn't have to share me with anyone, ever. When Courtney, our second baby, came along Kara was so excited to share me and to have someone she got to love on, hold, feed and play with. Nate doesn't have the opportunity to love on a sweet new baby, but he does have to share me...all the time, with everyone. Kids learn to share when they're two or three. We had to find ways to teach Kara to do this with us. Nate was born sharing. He shares my time, my hugs, my conversations. He shares his life and time at baseball diamonds, high school musicals, jr high plays, elementary choir concerts, soccer fields. Now he's at the age that he's getting involved in things outside of our family. He's loving being a big kid and showing off for his family, "just like my big brother and sisters."
So on this mother's day, I think of my mom and all she taught me by example and by stopping what she's doing for a sweet teaching moment. I'm thankful they were foster parents. I have lost contact with all of our foster children, but loved each of them and would've defended them all just like they were my blood brothers and sisters. I feel fortunate having had a rare opportunity to "safely" see firsthand the sadness some families have, the result of not having loving supportive parents. All of these things have helped me be the mother I am and the person I am today. I hope I honor and will continue to honor my parents by living the life I do and always trying my best to be the best mom, wife and person I can be.
Me with the last group of foster kids we had in our home. I was 13 or 14. I hesitated to post this picture as it was my awkward years. (I'm in the red shirt) But we all had them...and survived them!
There is always something happy about every day. I once had a very bad, hard day. I don't remember all that happened that day. I'm sure it involved not getting a moment alone, not getting a shower, having babies get sick on my shoulders. fussing kids, I may not have even gotten to eat anything other than little kid leftovers because I didn't have time to make me something to eat, the next paycheck never came fast enough. I do remember at the end of that day I told Jim, "I'm thankful for my microwave." THAT was my happy for the day. I had a microwave to warm a bottle for a crying baby, I had a microwave to thaw meat for dinner. There is always something to be happy about. I hope you find the happy in your life today. And think of the moms in your life...like our foster kids, they don't have to be your biological mom...there are all kinds of moms out there that have loved us and helped us become the people we are today.
I'll write a blog again this week, I've got lots to say. :) Until then, I hope you find the happy and feel free to share it here or anywhere for others to see. Happiness is contagious!
Me, mom & dad 1975, my brother is behind the camera
My parents were foster parents for 9 or 10 years when I was growing up. I loved being involved when I was a kid but it was years later that I gained full appreciation for that experience and the opportunity it gave me to grow as a future mom. The heart breaking moments were when I'd watch my mom cry for days over a foster child going back to their mom. Just because they weren't living with us anymore didn't mean she quit worrying and praying for them. These kids all grew to love her and call her mom. She treated them just like she did my brother and myself and they had the same expectations we had. I got to see how excited she was when a 12 year old girl moved in with us and she was reading at a second grade level. By the beginning of the school year this girl was reading at her appropriate grade level. My mom was so proud of this young girl, who was the same age I was. I think she was my favorite foster sister. Probably because I had a built in friend to always hang out with. We did argue like sisters but it always ended with an apology and laughter, usually strongly encouraged by mom. Had it not been for my parents fostering others' babies until they were ready to, I wouldn't have learned how to do the basic baby or child care. I learned how to calm down a crying baby, change diapers, the unpleasant job of washing cloth diapers, how to patiently solve children disputes, how to unconditionally love every child.
me with 2 foster brothers, I'm 9 or 10. My brother was about to leave home and I was stepping into life as the oldest kid at home.
me & Tammy Welch, we are 12. She'd learned to read but we hadn't yet learned how to read a recipe box. Mom's birthday cake...fail! Mom told me years later dad was taking pieces of cake to work and throwing them away so we'd think it was being eaten. fortunately I've learned a thing or 2 since then.
By natural birth order, I'm the baby. I was reading the Birth Order book a few years ago. I initially read it as a mother, but then started reading it as a child. I found it a very interesting book. It says that after a four year gap, the next child will have the first born characteristics. Which explains why my brother and I have many typical first born personality traits. We are both protective of one another and our families, we are ambitious, if there's a problem in a situation--we are not afraid to find a solution and try it out. If there's something we want or need to do, we find a way to do it or get it done. Having foster siblings I was not only the baby of the family and after my brother moved out, I was the only child at home; I had the opportunity to be the oldest, only, youngest and middle child. As I read the Birth Order Book, it was so interesting to me how I could relate with each birth order and the "difficulties and successes" they can have in a family. Had it not been for my parents being foster parents I wouldn't have learned as much as I did in life, as a child, about parenting, about loving others and doing good in the world and not expecting anything in return.
When my oldest daughter, Kara, was 7 she was the oldest of four babies. I relied on her to be my extra arms when I went someplace. "Kara can you push the stroller while I carry the car seat and diaperbag and hold so and so's hand?" She would always happily jump in line and push the stroller, she rarely complained about doing a chore for me or helping pick up toys her younger siblings threw around. Nate, my now 7 year old son, has never pushed a stroller, helped change a diaper, entertained a younger sibling while I make dinner or get a quick shower. I love each of my children fiercely and just as much as I love the next one. I love different things about each one too. While Nate is the baby of the family, he does things that Kara didn't need to or have the opportunity to do. We were a young family and didn't have much money when she was little. Jim was still in college, we were still finding our way in life. She had 2 years with me 24/7. She doesn't remember those years but she didn't have to share me with anyone, ever. When Courtney, our second baby, came along Kara was so excited to share me and to have someone she got to love on, hold, feed and play with. Nate doesn't have the opportunity to love on a sweet new baby, but he does have to share me...all the time, with everyone. Kids learn to share when they're two or three. We had to find ways to teach Kara to do this with us. Nate was born sharing. He shares my time, my hugs, my conversations. He shares his life and time at baseball diamonds, high school musicals, jr high plays, elementary choir concerts, soccer fields. Now he's at the age that he's getting involved in things outside of our family. He's loving being a big kid and showing off for his family, "just like my big brother and sisters."
Kara 7, Court 5, Natalie 2 weeks, Hunter 16 months, Jim (29 but don't tell him I told ya!)
So on this mother's day, I think of my mom and all she taught me by example and by stopping what she's doing for a sweet teaching moment. I'm thankful they were foster parents. I have lost contact with all of our foster children, but loved each of them and would've defended them all just like they were my blood brothers and sisters. I feel fortunate having had a rare opportunity to "safely" see firsthand the sadness some families have, the result of not having loving supportive parents. All of these things have helped me be the mother I am and the person I am today. I hope I honor and will continue to honor my parents by living the life I do and always trying my best to be the best mom, wife and person I can be.
There is always something happy about every day. I once had a very bad, hard day. I don't remember all that happened that day. I'm sure it involved not getting a moment alone, not getting a shower, having babies get sick on my shoulders. fussing kids, I may not have even gotten to eat anything other than little kid leftovers because I didn't have time to make me something to eat, the next paycheck never came fast enough. I do remember at the end of that day I told Jim, "I'm thankful for my microwave." THAT was my happy for the day. I had a microwave to warm a bottle for a crying baby, I had a microwave to thaw meat for dinner. There is always something to be happy about. I hope you find the happy in your life today. And think of the moms in your life...like our foster kids, they don't have to be your biological mom...there are all kinds of moms out there that have loved us and helped us become the people we are today.
I'll write a blog again this week, I've got lots to say. :) Until then, I hope you find the happy and feel free to share it here or anywhere for others to see. Happiness is contagious!
Thursday, May 1, 2014
NASA has Houston, we have our kitchen.
I have a sign above my kitchen window that reads, "Kitchens are made to bring families together." It's absolutely true in my house. Our kitchen is Command Central. EVERY thing happens in our kitchen! Mail gets delivered, homework is done, breakfast and after school snacks are eaten around the island. School day chats happen around the island. Parties start and stop here. If I ever lose a teenager I know right were to look for them...in front of the refrigerator! Coupon clipping and grocery list making, dancing, singing and of course cooking and cleaning all happen in the kitchen.
Our kitchen is a slow work in progress. As time and money come together we are making it the perfect kitchen for us. With all the goes on in our kitchen I wanted a high energy, creative, warm color on the walls. I love red, so that's what I chose. The stove in the island was a must go. We've moved the refrigerator to the left, the stove where the refrigerator was. The refrigerator is the most crucial part of our kitchen. Not only does it hold all of the best foods, it has all of our most important information.
Our oldest daughter came home for Christmas break and was so excited to share her great idea, "We use the refrigerator as a white board. We leave messages for each other on it." Ding Ding Ding!!! Great idea moment!!!! With leftover chalkboard paint from my youngest son's bedroom, I thought, "I can stop the question of 'What's for dinner?'!" So, I painted the freezer door with chalkboard paint. I then painted a blank calendar and made magnets with each child's name and chores. Now if anyone wants to know what's for dinner or who has what chore, we look on the freezer. Just like Kara, we use the refrigerator as a white board. I have a dry erase marker in a nearby drawer and the kids know that if they use the last of something, they write it on the "white board" and that's how I start my shopping list. No more forgotten ponytail holders, toothpaste, mousse or favorite lunch food. I don't know that I would do this to a new refrigerator but this very loved "fridge" is at least 10 years old. The handle cover is missing and they don't make them this big anymore. So we are using this until it dies and can no longer be repaired...or until we no longer need to hold 5 gallons of milk on one shelf. The bucket on top of the refrigerator is where I keep all of our paper plates and plastic cups & forks. Quick grab for extra kids, BBQs or impromptu gatherings with starving kids.
On the wall to the left of the fridge is the remainder of Command Central. I found a calendar at flylady.net that is the perfect calendar for us! It has EIGHT spaces on it...everyone has a space on every date. I LOVE this calendar. The bulletin board has homework deadlines, receipts for internet orders, pictures of our extended family. Once a week we gather the kids around the dining room table and have dessert while we go over the family calendar. Dessert is a must to keep all the kids in one spot long enough to do the boring stuff. We go day by day to find out who needs to be where, who's going to take them, how many drivers we need each night, who's working when, who has what homework deadlines, community, church or school meetings.
So, this is how I do what I do. How we get where we need to get. It takes some time to get us all organized but it's so worth it as things seem to run a bit more smoothly most days. I find it's easier to find the happy when we're not stressing about who needs to be where and we don't hear, "We're out of toilet paper!" or "I need white posterboard for a project tonight!" Life with children, regardless of the size of family, needs flexibility. Which is why I chose a chalkboard, whiteboard, bulletin board and paper calendar. Everything is erasable and can be easily moved around if needed.
I hope these ideas help you or at least inspire creativity in you to find what works for your family.
Until my next post, remember to find the happy in life.
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